>Should I Send It?

  1. >Send it. It will make you feel better and maybe just maybe it will change her life for the better.

  2. Susan says:

    >My evil teacher was Mrs. Luchini. She taughter German. She was a horrible, horrible woman, who hated me for no good reason. In fact, she forgot to buy my return ticket from Germany after our month long visit as exchange students. How I hated that woman. But you are right. I did learn a great deal from her, mostly how not to act as an adult towards children.

  3. W. M. says:

    >I’d say not, it would do no good to send it really, but I’m glad you got it off your chest!

  4. Michelle says:

    >As a former English teacher (grades 7-12) – SEND IT. That kind of behavior is totally uncalled for & just wrong. Make sure you send her the link to your writing, too.

  5. jenontheedge says:

    >Send it!!! I say this as someone who had a similar teacher for TWO classes in 12th grade and whose bullying haunts me to this day. Luckily, he bullied almost everyone and I wasn’t singled out, but we all still hate him to this day.

  6. Kelly says:

    >I would absolutely send this. Fantastic letter… hope it was cathartic for you.

  7. >If it would do no good, I wouldn’t even think of sending it, but now that I’m a parent, I’m leaning toward doing it. It sickens me to think of her doing this to more kids when I could have at least made her stop and think about it first. If I’m really feeling evil, I’ll cc it to the principal, too!

  8. Becky says:

    >I had a bully for a teacher in 3rd grade. It was ridiculous, as I was a great student and definitely not a trouble maker. She just had it in for me. It was just AWFUL. I don’t think I went to recess once that year. If the whole class was talking, I would get in trouble. I’m really glad that I had an amazing teacher the next year because I could have been soured towards school forever. Maybe someday I’ll write a similar letter – I think you should send it if you think that she might really change her behavior. Beckyhttp://www.stinkylemsky.typepad.com/

  9. lori says:

    >I say send it. I had a male teacher ridicule me in 10th grade English (for my appearance, he called me sloppy. Nice one. Way to understand the shy, socially awkward, trying to fit in Teen there dude). I’m a much stronger person now and I always wished I had said something then.

  10. Carol Saha says:

    >This brought tears to my eyes. I’m not sure why except I have a boy starting 9th grade this year. I actually took my older daughter out of school in 7th grade and homeschooled because of the teachers. In retrospect I’m not sure that was the wisest choice. I’m forwarding this to my boy and then we are going to talk about it.

  11. Carol Saha says:

    >Oh yeah, yes, send it. And cc it to the principal and the school board. Save a kid.

  12. Diane says:

    >Personally, I wouldn’t send it. You’ve used your experience as a teaching opportunity with your daughters, so some good has come out of it.Are you sure she is even teaching anymore (not that you’re old – you’re not!!! but she may have retired already)?

  13. >Nope, she’s still teaching the same class.

  14. >Send it! I agree about cc’ing the principal too…especially if she is still teaching there.I actually had a teacher who did not like me, or many other kids, actually. I did stand up to her, though, for another student, when she called him ‘stupid’ in front of the entire class. She threatened to send me to see the dean and I told her not to bother, I would go on my own and I would be happy to tell him exactly what just happened.I was not a disrespectful student in any way, but I could not let her talk like that. So I went to see the dean, told him what happened and he told me that was not the first complaint he has had against her (though he probably should not have!). It was fortunate that the dean had been a teacher just the year before and I was in one of his classes. He knew me and my family and the kind of person I was…that I would not behave that way in a normal situation.I stayed in her class, there was never a problem after that day, though she never spoke to me again.She left our school after that year…probably moved on to another school to verbally abuse those students.

  15. Kim says:

    >Send it! Send it to her, the principal and the school board by certified mail as well as the local newspaper for the area. People who bully children/teens do not belong in education. If you can – hand deliver the letter. People tend to blow off as crackpots those not physically in their presence when shameful truths are revealed. Don’t give her the chance.

  16. Nicole says:

    >Send it? Hell, I’d hand-deliver it to the bitch! Reading your post brought up all the memories of the bully teachers I had over the years and it still stings just thinking about them (and I was a good student and by no means a trouble-maker). There is a special place in hell for those who belittle or crush the spirit of a child or young person. Thank goodness you are talking to your stepdaughters about your experience so they will be equipped to handle a person like Mrs. Lowell.

  17. Anonymous says:

    >Send it, yes, but maybe if you wrote another letter to a teacher you really liked, one that inspired you, and sent it as well, you would feel better.

  18. Sarah says:

    >Send it, and this is why: it is not that difficult for one of your readers to figure out where you went to high school and which teachers have been there since that point in time. It would be much more detrimental for your teacher to stumble upon this letter on the Internet somehow (an acquaintance who also read, a principal who used google from time to time, whatever) and – regardless of whether or not you used her real last name – think it might be her. It would also be much more detrimental for another teacher to stumble upon it and think it might have been about her and feel unnecessarily miserable.As someone who has a very high respect for educators and what they tolerate for the sake of our future, I say that you owe it to yourself and to your teacher and to all of your other teachers to make sure that she reads this. That said, I also think that it wouldn’t hurt to let the teachers who inspired you know. Not only will it balance things out a little bit, but showing the gratitude due that individual will stay with them forever and teach your steps another valuable lesson.

  19. sophsmum says:

    >I say send it… if you are sure that you will never become a teacher. I wrote something similar and sent it. Nineteen years later, I had to face her in a job interview. I didn’t get the job. It felt really good at the time,though.

  20. >Is it her birthday? What’s the occasion?

  21. Manager Mom says:

    >Oh. that SUCKS. and really spoke to me. I had my own mrs. Lowell and her shockwaves still hit me, even to this day…

  22. feefifoto says:

    >Sounds like you had the Professor Snape of your school.There’s no point sending it to her because people like her blame everyone else for their problems. By all means, though, send it to the school board and the principal.

  23. >It’s funny that some of you are saying I should send a letter to a teacher who positively inspired me, because I had already decided to do that. But I’m not posting them on the same day! :Dsophsmum, that story is hilarious. Also, this was a school I went to before the school I graduated from, so I think it would actually be quite difficult to figure out which school it was, unless you went to school with me there (and very few of you did!)

  24. Ms. K says:

    >I’m a mom and a teacher and I absolutely think you should send it. I also think you should send it to the prinicpal and district administration. No one has the right to treat others that way! I was going to say that I don’t know why people like that are teachers, but I guess I do know why. They’re bullies, and students are taught to respect teachers so they don’t stand up for themselves. Easy pickins’ for a bully.

  25. >Also, isn’t it telling that so many of us had teachers like this? My girls have had them, too. I really think that some adults go into teaching to avenge themselves for their own horrible high school days… And some just enjoy having a power over their students that they will never have over anyone else- then they abuse it horribly.The majority teachers, of course, aren’t mean at all and a certain few are absolutely awe inspiring…

  26. Anonymous says:

    >Absolutely send it. What do you have to lose? There is a chance (albeit small) that this may have a positive influence on the witch and if it doesn’t, oh well. This really isn’t about her, it’s about you.Do it!XXOO Laurie

  27. kiri8 says:

    >I think you should send it. I’m a teacher, and I’m appalled. (Also, my creative writing teacher in high school — Ms. P. — was WONDERFUL. Now I realize how lucky I was. My favorite memory of her class was when she started the poetry unit by passing out a poem about rain and soliciting comments. Given that it was amateurish and full of trite cliches about rain on the windowpane and sadness, I had plenty to say, but she wouldn’t call on me. She called on one student after another who praised the poem, and then FINALLY she gave me my turn. The class gasped when I said, “I think this is a bad poem.” She grinned, and it was a totally triumphant moment.)

  28. Ron says:

    >I say don’t send it. Childhood and teenage memories are often magnified through the prism of time and age.Do you really think she will change her behavior now because you write a letter? You’re a powerful writer but I doubt it. Do you think the principal will consider the letter from someone who graduated…ummm, some few years back?I agree with Diane. You’ve used it as a teaching tool, move on.

  29. Blue Lady says:

    >Yes, send it to her and to the principal. She won’t change her attitude, but she might hesitate lashing out at this year’s chosen victim if she knows it will come back at her.I’m sending this to Angst and Hippie so that they just know it isn’t in their imagination when teachers act like this.

  30. motherbumper says:

    >I say send it, and send it on behalf of all that were bullied by a teacher. My teacher bully was Mrs. Bryson in grade seven and the day that she told me she “hated” (yes hated) me because I was a spoiled rich kid is burned on my brain forever. BTW – the only truth in her assessment was the “kid” part. Unfortunately bullies aren’t just students. Sad but very true.

  31. uumomma says:

    >wow…i would also hand deliver it.

  32. Kristen says:

    >I’ll bet Mrs. Lowell acts completely different when the principal sits in the classroom to do teacher evaluations, so I would absolutely cc this letter to the principal. I doubt it will bring down a crummy teacher, but it will open some eyes about the quality of teaching at this school.

  33. Crazy MomCat says:

    >I am going to sound just like my mother here, but since I lived through something similar (though not quite as awful as yours) I really can relate.I think your teacher probably behaved in such an immature way because she saw a bright and beautiful girl with a lot of talent and the whole world in front of her. Chances are, she was…as weird as it sounds…jealous and threatened by that.What she did was so unethical. I had a journalism prof like this college who decided she didn’t like me because on the first day of class I made the mistake of wearing my sorority letters. She doted on a friend of mine in the class instead. The teacher was very overweight. My friend was as well. The funny thing? My friend was actually IN my sorority and WAY more into it that I was, but just didn’t happen to wear her letters to class. But she labeled me as a little blonde sorority beeothch and that was that–I had to fight for every grade in that class 2 times harder than everyone else.Send it. If nothing else, you’ll get closure and maybe it will make that woman take an anger management class or get into therapy. God knows, she needs to!

  34. Crazy MomCat says:

    >Gosh, that was long. Sorry!

  35. >How freaking SAD! Dylan just finished a year with a teacher like this and I wrote to the principal to tell him (I blogged it). Never heard back. Nothing.If this ever happens again to one of my kids, I’ll remember this Lindsay and take action right away rather than waiting until the end of the year. I feel like an awful mother for having waited but I didn’t want it to get worse for Dylan if I had spoken up sooner. Also? I say send it. xo

  36. Karen says:

    >Send it, Lindsay. I agree with everything Sarah said, this will most likely get back to the woman at some time in the future, but I’d like to take it one step further. This woman NEEDS to be held accountable for her behavior. Sure she’s human, sure she may be having a shitty day/life, but that does NOT give her the right to take her frustrations/dislikes/grievances out on innocent children. I’m a fair person and I look at all angles of a problem. I’m also not the type of person to go off the handle and just react without getting all the facts. But I think this woman’s behavior needs to be addressed if not for the simple fact that she’s aware that people are now watching her and perhaps that knowledge in and of itself will force her to straighten up.She most likely continues to behave this way toward her students because she’s confident that because they are kids, it’s her word against theirs. Someone needs to stand up and be the voice of those kids who are most likely not being heard. The principal needs to be CC’d on every single correspondence you might ever have with her. 1. It protects you and 2. the principal is kept in the loop on what’s going on, therefore the teacher can not distort the truth.This issue goes beyond any kind of closure you might have with that time period; you’re bringing attention to a much larger issue and one that impacts hundreds of other innocent, awkward, pubescent teenagers. This woman NEEDS to be reprimanded for her unprofessional behavior.Even if she’s mellowed over time, she needs to be aware that her behavior will catch up to her and people are on to her. It’s amazing how we change our attitudes when people are paying attention!Write From Karen

  37. Anonymous says:

    >I see your point, and understand your desire to send it. However, I don’t think I would. I hope you don’t take offense, and I am only giving my opinion because you asked. I really hope you don’t get upset.First, I think it is a little passive agressive. What do you expect to happen? She will write you back? She will suddenly change her ways? No. She will either dismiss it entirely, thinking you are the same “troublemaker” you were back then or she will become angry and defensive and take it out on more as she sees “ungrateful” students. Second, honestly, it seems a wee bit immature to me. I agree with a previous poster that your vision of the past is through the eyes of a teenager. So it is probably not entirely “accurate”. I would either rise above it, write the letter for you own edification and use it to teach your daughters or if it is really bothering you, make the time to attempt to talk to her personally, face to face.

  38. Cathy Burke says:

    >I say send it. The best part is you did learn and passed on good information to your girls. And when they come home in tears over a teacher who “hates” them they can trust that you DO understand. And also you can now see how this teacher was most likely jealous of you and your obvious talent (thinking someone would hope to pass off your great stories for a good grade!). Maybe she had a bad childhood without a supportive mom (or stepmom) and continues to torture students. Are you sure she is really alive? Maybe she is a witch haunting the school!

  39. Holly says:

    >I have no real advice on sending or not, but I will say this one strikes deep with me. I’m a high school English teacher, but I also remember having absurd teachers like this. I know what it’s like to have your last nerve trampled on by some teenager who is blatantly disregarding class policy (not that you were), but I also know what it is to be a professional…and to seek to inspire instead of put down constantly.I’m going to keep this in mind.

  40. Anonymous says:

    >my god get over yourself

  41. Allison Says says:

    >Yes, send it. Teachers like that should be told that they need to change their ways. I think many of us went through that at one point or another, and if you can help students from not having to go through that more power to you! I think it’s great. It’s not a rude letter, it’s matter of fact. Send away!

  42. Tipp says:

    >Shut up Anonymous! And why don’t you put a name behind your feelings if you feel so strongly?I say send it. People need to realize and be held accountable for the humiliation and emotional stress they cause people when a little bit of authority goes to their head.

  43. merlotmom says:

    >You go, Girl! Mine was Dr. Hoerger, in sixth grade. It wasn’t so much that he disliked me, more that he didn’t care to know me, no matter how hard I tried. I’d had a previous teacher who loved me and nurtured my writing, this a-hole squashed all that. My confidence was in the crapper. I didn’t write again until I was in my 30’s. I love that you wrote a letter. I hope one day she reads it.

  44. >Absolutely SEND IT. Especially because she’s still teaching. What a terrible way to treat a kid just starting out in high school!

  45. Amy says:

    >Send it!!! I think it’ll shock her to know what a long term effect her actions had on someone. Hopefully it’ll make her think twice before she berates another student.

  46. Anonymous says:

    >Hand deliver it! I’m the first to admit I wasn’t the best behaved student, but I certainly wasn’t a bad kid. I had problems at home – lots of them – and now that I’m an adult and understand a little bit more about life, I’m pretty sure that had a lot to do with it. The thing is, there is a way to handle students who are misbehaving WITHOUT making them feel bad about themselves. I had teachers who didn’t like me & handled my bad days poorly, and teachers who didn’t like me that handled me properly, and a few spectacular teachers that I adored, who loved all of their students (or at least most of them) and I didn’t really act up with. I think if you make a whole hearted effort to like and accept each of your students, for all their strengths, w/ all their weaknesses, you can’t go wrong. It’s those few teachers who stand out in my mind to this day, and make me not remember the poor teachers I did have. Thank you Mr. Hoosier (7th grade math) & Mr. Hawkins (8th grade science) at Franklin Middle, and Mrs. Sally Reiner (HS Spanish) at West High for being a positive influence in my life.Thanks for sharing this with all of us, Lindsay.Shannon SteinfeldtWest High Class of 2000

  47. Holly says:

    >Do you know if she’s still like that? People can change a lot in a few years, and it’s possible you’re right that she was having a really awful year. Clearly she had no excuse to treat you like that, but maybe (fingers crossed) she’s matured through the years. Would she still learn from the letter, even if she has changed? If so, then send it. Tough choice, though. And good for you for finding a silver lining and passing it on.

  48. Anonymous says:

    >don’t send it- it won’t chagne anything, and won’t make you feel better. hang on to the letter for your personal history, and for your children, but don’t send it.

  49. >Thank you for helping me appreciate my freshman English teacher (who was also my Brit Lit teacher when I was a senior).

  50. Omaha Mama says:

    >Send it! Yes!Why is it always the language teachers?

  51. Anonymous says:

    >I’m a high school Emglish teacher. I teach freshmen through seniors. I know I’ve had days where I was like Mrs. Lowell, becuse I’m human, but if she was truly like that _every single day_, then yes, you should let her know. I don’t know if it will make much difference if that is truly the type of teacher she is, but it might. If she’s still teaching, her future students will thank you. (And yes, send a copy to the principal.)

  52. kittenpie says:

    >Wow. I’m sorry you had that, because a teacher can make such a difference in how you appraoch an entire subject. It might feel better to send it, but I’m guessing it feels better already, just having written it. PS love the new header!

  53. Anonymous says:

    >Yeah, and I’m a high school ENGLISH teacher who can’t type. Blah. 🙂

  54. Anonymous says:

    >I wouldn’t send it. What would you be trying to accomplish, just making her feel bad? If you want the letter to have some actual effect I think it would need to be rewritten with a different tone. It comes across as a very mad, emotional letter from someone holding a grudge and since you went to school there long ago it would be easy for the school to ignore and would likely just make her more bitter unless she’s changed. It really might be worth sending something but I wouldn’t send this. Think about the desired effect and whether this letter is likely to achieve it if you want to send it. (Powerful writing though and a shame you went through this!)

  55. Shirley says:

    >send it send it send it!!! what a byatch!! send it then send the principal an ass kissey letter about how you would love to speak in her class and show them your articles

  56. twithhoney says:

    >Sadly I too suffered similarly in high school and the two worst were both English teachers.

  57. Anonymous says:

    >instead of giving more life to her negativity, why not write a positive letter to a teacher who inspired you?

  58. >It’s interesting that this post is stirring up so much emotion- I mean, we all feel this way about someone, don’t we? I do know that I spent a LOT of time trying to win this woman over, to no avail. I do still remember how my stomach started hurting every day just thinking about having to go to her class. I thought I was just dealing with a fact of life back then, but now as a mom, it makes me pretty angry that she was getting away with treating kids like that- I have no doubt that it happened to other kids besides me.I told my husband about the experience when we were still dating, while we were in my hometown and he tried very hard to convince me to drive straight to the school with him and confront her directly with him there too, for moral support! He was totally serious! Now that would have been interesting!

  59. Anonymous says:

    >I think you should absolutely send it. I had a teacher like this and to this day (10 yrs later) I still wish I could give her an ear full. Maybe you will open her eyes to what a horrible person she was. You had to endure her abuse, your fellow classmates abuse and the boy that had behavioral problems. The way you were describing him was sexual harrasement. So, yeah. I would definitely send it to her. To all the people that say it would just spread more negativity and that it wouldn’t change her: Somebody should have stood up to this bully of a women years ago. If we allow people to treat us this way, then when does it stop?Go for it. Send it today! If I could get ahold of the teachers address that treated me badly I would do the same thing.

  60. ALM says:

    >Absofrigginlutely. Send it.

  61. Kimberly says:

    >I would send it. If you can save even one child from similar torture then it’s worth it. She sounds truly evil; I’m sorry you had to go through that.

  62. Esa says:

    >ABSOLUTELY send it, and cc the principal! I know you probably don’t expect her to suddenly see the error of her ways and change…after all these years that is just not going to happen…but she needs to know (as well as her superiors) that even after several years have passed, you still feel the negative aspects of her teaching style. I have a daughter entering 9th grade, and although she hasn’t had a teacher like that, she has had a basketball coach who had such a negative impact on her it almost made her quit the sport. Luckily, she’s changing schools and the new coach is a dream. Since she had the bad experience first, now she really appreciates the good one.

  63. >Linsday- you HAVE to send this AND absolutely cc the principal and the school board. You have to know there are countless other kids who had the same experience with her and until enough people have the courage to speak up, it will continue- there is no possible harm… if she has changed her ways since then- great, but if she hasn’t, your testimony will lend credence to the other parents/students who have surely complained and have likely been brushed off by the administration.

  64. >Unfortunately, I work with plenty of teachers like the one you describe. My suggestion? Write to your favorite teacher (or teachers)—the ones who supported you and believed in you—and let them know that their efforts have not gone unnoticed or unused. Tell them about the positive difference they’ve made in your life.As for Mrs. Lowell? What would you accomplish in sending her the letter? Will she read it and think to herself that she was “right” about you (assuming she remembers you)—in that you’re still disrupting things in her class?I totally get why you’d want to send it. Goodness knows I’ve written my own share of letters like this. But think carefully about what good can be had in sending it. Show your children that all of the other teachers you had in your life deserve care and praise, rather than focusing attention on one oh-so-rotten apple.

  65. >I’d say send it. It’s obviously a situation that deeply affected you. If yours is the only letter/complaint they’ve ever received, it will be dismissed and the woman won’t be any worse for wear. But if yours is one of many it might be the straw that leads to some concrete action.As you said, there are bullies everywhere and at every age and the only way they’ll ever be called on their behavior is if people speak up about the way they were treated.Anna

  66. sarah cool says:

    >SEND IT. These people are impacting thousands of children’s lives over the years, on a daily basis, for hours and hours a week. It was inappropriate for her to treat you that way, as a student and as a human being. It was a sort of abuse. No one should have to go through that in school – sometimes, high school classmates are hard enough on kids. It is absolutely inappropriate for a TEACHER to add to that stress and pain.It takes a special kind to teach and love high school students (…… AND junior high students…). Apparently this lady ain’t it. :)I also think that if you are looking for real CHANGE and not just to give her an internal gut-check, CC the principal. And I think your motive behind this should be change, to protect other students. This makes me mad! Kids have enough pain to deal with w/o witchy teachers harboring a grudge.

  67. erdybell says:

    >I say send it, for several reasons. 1) I’m a teacher. That is unbelievable behavior. Someone should bring light to it.2) It always does us good to let things out. I had a doctor tell my mom, with me sitting right there that I was mentally retarded. He proceeded to hand her several handouts on local mental institutions that she could put me away in…because I’d “never make it past the mental age of 5”.Now, according to some, I’m still a silly 30 yr old. (I refuse to say retarded). But a high school degree, college degree, AND a Master’s degree proudly display my intelligence. People’s actions/words in our lives can bear a lot of weight if we let them. Thank goodness my mom knew better. Please send it, especially if she’s still teaching. I spent my life thinking “Am I smart enough?” Can you imagine the turmoil she’s causing in other children? It makes my heart sad.

  68. Helen says:

    >It sounds like she decided you were the ringleader for the talkers in class, so decided to hold you up for example. I hate it when teachers do this, it’s lazy and rarely works. It is bullying too, but probably accepted by the school. Particularly since she still works there.I wouldn’t send it, if she still works in the same school and is as bad as you say, there would have been many complaints. Clearly the school considers this kind of discipline method acceptable:(

  69. punxxi says:

    >people like that are the reason I quit high school after the 1st year

  70. Liongoddess says:

    >I’m with many of the others- I’d send it and cc the principal & school board.I had 2 teachers in Jr. high who pretty much killed any inclination I had to pay attention in school. The first, my 7th grade English/Social Studies teacher, demanded that my parents BOTH come in for a conference (which meant that they both had to leave work). They went and were told how stupid and lazy I was. My teacher was writing a lesson on the borad and kept her back to my parents the entire time. After about 5 minutes of that crap, my mother told her that if her classes were nearly as illiterate as the lesson she was scrawling on the board it was no surprise that I wasn’t doing my work or paying attention. Mom then went on to correct the 16 spelling, 5 grammatical, and 7 punctuation errors for her before dragging my speechless father down to the principal’s office to file a complaint about the witch.The other was my 8th grade english/social studies teacher. She was a racist and bitterly dislked me for being biracial- like I had any say in the matter! We were studying the Constitution and she asked our class which amendment freed the slaves. 30 kids stared at her blankly, and I finally raised my hand and guessed that it was the 14th. I now know and will never forget that it was the 13th amendment. She screamed at me for 20 minutes that it was appalling that I didn’t know what amendment set my people free, that I was so ignorant that I should just go be a slave, and I should never open my mouth if I didn’t know what I was talking about.I was 13. It didn’t occur to me that I could/should get up and go to the principal’s office or find another teacher. I just sat there, stunned until the bell rang for the next class. My next class was taught by a woman who also had a biracial daughter. I walked into her room, burst into tears, and when my friends explained what had happened, she LOST IT. She actually went flying up to the other teacher’s room and went for her throat. It took 5 other teachers to separate them. Sadly, even after everything calmed down, my parents were told, grievances were filed, etc, the old bat never apologized.Whew- sorry this is so long! But bad teachers really can scar a kid for life and need to be told off, if not stopped outright.thanks for letting me rant.

  71. trainy says:

    >Send it. She needs to know how her behavior affects students.

  72. >I appreciate the advice that some have offered about writing positive letters to teachers that did do their job well and deserve to hear about it, but doing that and sending this one aren’t mutually exclusive. Do both! What is the saying, something about “evil thriving when good people sit by and do nothing”? Some of you have asked, “what good it would do”. Really? You don’t think that making a stand, no matter how belated, can’t do some good? Sure, there is a chance that she will simply press delete and forget about it and that the principal will ignore it, BUT, there is also a good chance that it will be a catalyst for change, and that chance alone makes it worth doing.

  73. ewe are here says:

    >YES.And when you do, send copies to the principal and the superintendant.That’s outrageous.

  74. Ginny says:

    >I’d send it, very well written!

  75. egretsnest says:

    >Please send it. I am a teacher and a parent. I still remember my terrible teacher — 3rd grade. She yelled at me for writing my name in cursive on a paper. Said I’d make the other kids feel stupid — even in 3rd grade I knew that they wouldn’t feel stupid if she hadn’t said anything. It was humiliating and kids don’t have tools for dealing with that sort of thing. If she weren’t teaching, I’d tell you to let it go. Since she is, I think you should send it and cc the principal. Who knows . . . this could be the final straw where someone finally intervenes. Thank you for talking to your children about it and protecting them. The stories by your readers make me sad for our education system. Most teachers are NOT like this.

  76. Anonymous says:

    >Send it. Speak up for all of us who have dealt with women like her.

  77. >I wonder what makes a teacher single out a student. I say send it and let her think about the reasons why she would do that to a 14 year old child.

  78. Jenny says:

    >I’m probably saying the same thing the other 81 respondents have said – SEND IT SEND IT SEND IT! We ALL suffered through something like that – and I am now (after seeing this) getting the guts to confront the people that caused me the misery you just described! =)

  79. >You need to send it for all of us who had horrible experiences with teachers. It is such a different time now–there is no way a teacher would be able to treat someone the way I was treated in 1985 in my geometry class. My teacher actually called me retarded on more than one occasion in front of the entire class. My parents didn’t believe me until parent teacher conferences when he informed them that I was lazy and didn’t deserve to pass the class. My father and sister had spent a minimum of 3 hours a night tutoring me just so I could pass. That was the day they pulled me out of the class. Too bad they didn’t call the principal. I have written this very letter a thousand times in my head. I heard my teacher was fired years later. Take THAT Mr. Jonas, fired ex-teacher from LaPorte High School!!!!!

  80. Clayjack says:

    >I’m not sure why it took me so long to find your blog, but I’m finding I love it. Okay, ego stroke over. I say send it. I know teachers feed off the things students send them after they’ve left their class, and I would imagine it’s a source of reflection and contemplation for them. She probably didn’t/doesn’t get many positive letters from former students. Maybe yours will help her to understand why that is, and try to affect a change in her style, despite it being so late in her career.Plus, another part of me loves those long overdue, haddaya like them apples? kinds of situations.

  81. Anonymous says:

    >Ironically my 9th grade english teacher did much the same to me. I found getting sent to the office made my life a lot easier. I wouldn’t give her the pleasure of letting her know how she made me feel though. If she knows she hurt you that bad, since she probably really didn’t like you for whatever reason, and she is that shitty of a person, then your letter will just make her feel good. Instead what I would do is get her address and send her a year subscription to the paper you write for. That’ll torture her. Considering most English teachers had their own dreams of writing, knowing the student she hated is doing what she never could. That’s way better than the letter.

  82. >I think you should send it, but with one addition….You did mention that you were looking forward to her class (initially)…but I would make sure to include your love of writing, and that you write professionally now….and what a shame it was that she wasnt the teacher that helped to grow and inspire you…you know the type, when you are on Oprah or something, and you tell about that one teacher that ignited your passion for journalism, or who helped guide and foster your talents…she could have been it,but chose instead, to try to snuff out your flame…..but in spirt of her, you shine on! (ok, how 9th grade literature was my little flame analogy????)SEND IT!

  83. SixValentes says:

    >People can change, so why not give her the chance? Send it! Please send it.

  84. Anonymous says:

    >Send it ASAP. Loved it. So true for too many students. My experience was actually with a college graduate assistant, JD Diateker, and I still hate the hag.

  85. Anonymous says:

    >so sad. I’m sorry you had such a terrible experience with an authority figure at such a young age. 🙁

  86. Zip n Tizzy says:

    >I had Mrs. Cooper in second grade. I thought for sure she was going to flunk me, she hated me so.My mother said she wouldn’t flunk me, because she didn’t want to have me in her class again. I was in 2nd grade!School was never the same for me again. Send it. Some people are so bitter they will never change, but you never know.Mrs. Cooper was so old then, I can hardly imagine she’s still alive, but people who work with kids need to be reminded of the effect they have on them.

  87. Anonymous says:

    >Send it. Brilliant piece of writing, either way.~Regular Lurker

  88. >Send it. No question. Not sure why some are saying that it will do no good – even if she doesn’t change her behaviour, she needs to be told how it had affected you.

  89. Mom 22 says:

    >I would send it for sure, with the CC to school admin. You have already gotten the best revenge, and that is happiness. Clearly this woman was bitter and miserable, and we all know misery loves company. Your success in writing and family is all the revenge you need.

  90. Anonymous says:

    >I did writing exercises like this in therapy once. My psychologist told me, “You can’t change how people treat you. You can really only change how you respond/react to the treatment.” I had people who I wanted to confront like this (and other people I needed to confront but didn’t want to) and he said to go for it as long as it helped ME in some way to do it. If I was just trying to change the person, or get back at the person, I shouldn’t. That being said, he also encouraged me that it’s never too late to make something right/better. So I’d say it depends on your motivations.

  91. Anonymous says:

    >I did writing exercises like this in therapy once. My psychologist told me, “You can’t change how people treat you. You can really only change how you respond/react to the treatment.” I had people who I wanted to confront like this (and other people I needed to confront but didn’t want to) and he said to go for it as long as it helped ME in some way to do it. If I was just trying to change the person, or get back at the person, I shouldn’t. That being said, he also encouraged me that it’s never too late to make something right/better. So I’d say it depends on your motivations.

  92. Anonymous says:

    >Have you by any chance watched Teaching Mrs. Tingle lately? Because it sounds like these emotions you’ve had about this teacher have surfaced lately for some other reason than the one you have mentioned.This experience happened many years ago. You. Need. To. Let. It Go.Furthermore, you are abusing your power by writing her a letter and publishing it on your blog. Is that how you wanted to turn the tables? Is that how you wanted to use what she taught you?We all have had teachers that were outstanding and some that weren’t. But, harboring resentment for the rest of your life is only letting her continue to make you feel insecure. Your choice, but I think your letter will get tossed in the trash.

  93. >What made me think of it, actually, was Facebook. All kinds of people from my past have been getting back in touch with me and it’s been interesting catching up and sharing what we remember about each other. Somehow, it gave me the idea of writing letters to those who inspired me- and those who brought me down. And really, the only one who brought me down who MAY be worth a letter is Mrs. Lowell. I posted it because I suspected that a lot of people had a Mrs. Lowell. And it looks like I was right.The interesting thing is that I’m sure she doesn’t read my blog (this was a very conservative religious school). I’m equally sure that this school isn’t anywhere on the Internet in association with my name. There’s no way someone wh doesn’t know me could figure out I went there. If she does read it, someone who knows both of us would have to send it to her- and in that case, that person probably has a gripe with her too, and maybe she really does need to read it…I also don’t see a problem with writing someone whenever the hell you want to tell the person he or she hurt you. Obviously, it helps the one who wrote the letter. And why would the person who did the hurting need to be protected? If I’m mean to someone, he or she has every right to tell me about it whenever he or she wants to. If I’m nice to someone, the same applies. It’s just the way it goes. I have been hurt as an adult and it was no big deal. But now, as a parent, those adults who intentionally hurt me as a child are getting a new dose of contempt from me. I have a new understanding of just how awful they were. I’m guessing a lot of you would agree with me on that.

  94. Amanda says:

    >I don’t really see how it’s abusing power. It’s not like people know who she is. And it raises an important question: How do we handle situations when we were wronged in the past (especially as an adolescent)?As far as sending it, I agree with what anonymous says: Try to figure out your motivation. If your motivation is to get back at her orchange her, it won’t help. If it helps you to provide closure, absent of the thought of revenge or change, do it.Another thing about teachers. It’s so important to tell the good ones how much they meant to you. I actually switched jobs from teaching because I felt like I couldn’t give enough to my students. It was after I switched that my students told me all the good stuff. All I heard when I taught them was whining about homework and stuff. If you can find an old teacher who meant something to you, drop them a note or email!

  95. Amy says:

    >I say send it, while it might not hit home with Mrs. Lowell, the reality is she impacted your life in a negative manner. I have had teachers that have said things to me that while they thought it was harmless little comment, impacted me far more than they will ever know.

  96. Anonymous says:

    >I agree with those who pointed out that these memories are probably skewed by time and a crappy teen attitude. If you were the fireball then that you seem to be now, I can see a teacher taking a dislike to you. If she truly were emotionally abusive, of course, it was not acceptable. But maybe, you just need to step back and look at this situation as an adult. As a veteran teacher, I’ve had plenty of experience dealing with teenage personalities. (For the record, I am a good teacher who requires good behavior. I have made children angry over the years. And almost always, they return to tell me what a great teacher I was and how much they learned from me. Even if at some point they did not like me.) I’d like to read Mrs. Lowell’s open letter to Lindsay Hudson.By the way, you asked, “Should I send it?” I’m not understanding the aggressive attitude displayed each time a reader posts a comment disagreeing with you.

  97. Dodi says:

    >Wow…I’ve been there with a certain teacher before and you really brought back some old feelings. Great post!I love your blog, by the way…very entertaining!

  98. Sandie says:

    >Oops.. that was me above.I feel so sorry for the High School Lindsay. That teacher is a complete ass- what makes me madder is that you know you weren’t the only one either. I bet each year she singled out someone to ridicule. I am glad you realized it was her, not you, even at that age.

  99. MrsBritney says:

    >I would send it.And send a copy to the place she works also.

  100. >Absolutely send it and cc her administrator. She needs to know the impact her actions had on you – whether she chooses to ignore them or use them to become a better teacher is totally up to her. If nothing else, maybe the principal will keep a closer eye on her.

  101. Rose says:

    >A resounding YES! Send it!

  102. Misti says:

    >Absolutely you should send it! How horrible for her to do that to. Maybe you’ll be able to help even one student not have to deal with her horrible behavior!

  103. reina says:

    >Please send it!! My son’s 6th grade teacher made him miserable, I won’t go into details- I am ashamed one year later of myself for not writting such a letter to the school district. I just don’t know where to start. Your letter is wonderful. Also send a copy to the principal, and every member of the school board, for those of us that can’t express our thoughts as eloquently as you.

  104. Carrien says:

    >I say send and cc to the principal, and publish it in the editorial section of the local paper.Here’s why. My little sister and I had the same piano teacher in elementary school. She is/was a very talented musician, but not very disciplined at least then. The teacher was very nice to me. My sister started saying she didn’t want to go to piano lessons and my mother couldn’t understand why. She was very young. So my mom dropped her off at the teacher’s house, and pretended to leave but stayed close enough to hear. And minute she thought my mom was gone she began haranguing my little sister with evil jealous spiteful words over and over again. Obviously they never went back.A bad teacher can do so much damage.Granted it’s grade 9 not elementary school. But I think teachers like that need to be outed. I think parents ought to know what she is like when no one is watching, and I think her other students deserve an older voice chiming in with them to help them deal with her.

  105. spinetingler says:

    >Send it to her, the administration, and maybe make copies to give to all of the kids in her classes. :)Kformer teacher

  106. Aimee says:

    >Listen. SEND IT.I am a teacher. I hold two masters degree’s AND I had a teacher, a guidance counselor and my OWN grandmother all tell me I should only consider community colleges. I also had a professor in college tell me the only reason why I made thus far was because I was WHITE and Pretty! I swallowed it whole. All those people that didn’t believe me. And I showed them who’s boss by being wellllll educated….and now teaching others.Those experiences made me a better teacher. Sure I have said things in my class I regret–but I work had at controlling who the adult is in the room–no matter what buttons are being pushed

  107. >You ABSOLUTELY NEED TO SEND THIS!!! It’s great! She needs to hear this!

  108. Jana says:

    >I had the same 9th grade misery, only with my Algebra teacher, Mr. Bott, a 50 something never married dufas looking gentleman, who obviously hated the site of anyone being happy around him. After he put my 14 year old ass in the “corner” for laughing, I finally complained to my mom. Who would have imagined she actually knew of him from many years before when the pervert sent a pair of crotchless underwear to my (married) aunt!!!! Guess we all know why he had never married…but I digress, I could not even think of wasting this priceless nugget of information…so the very next day I marched up to his desk before class and said,” So Mr. Bott, I understand you are somewhat familiar with my aunt Gladys….needless to say, he never bothered me again!

  109. B.E.C.K. says:

    >So far the biggest argument against sending it is “What good will it do to send it?” However, the real question to ask would be “Is there any harm in sending it and might it do some good?” I think if you rewrite it and send it to the principal with your phone number so you can be contacted for more information/discussion, your message would be received more successfully, esp. if you mention how the teacher’s abuse affected you to the point that you still remember it so clearly and painfully, and you suspect you were not the only one treated this way over the years, and you want to try to prevent this from happening to any more students — and why this has reached critical mass for you now. You would have a much better chance of being taken seriously after a rewrite — and then, yes, send it.

  110. Jenny says:

    >That is so sad. I am still trying to let go of a grudge with my third grade teacher, who victimized me and several other students. I remember her making a perfectly well-behaved and sweet boy cry in front of the entire class and then telling him to “suck it up.” What a B. You should send it. She deserves it, and maybe she doesn’t even realize what she was doing. It’s people like that who ask, “Why don’t children respect their elders?” Because age alone doesn’t, and shouldn’t, earn you respect!

  111. Old MD Girl says:

    >She reminds me of a teacher I had in the 3rd grade. I had one like that in the 11th grade too, but since it was math all he could do is *accuse* me of cheating when I nailed the crap out of his exams. Grrrrr….If you think sending it would make you feel better, do it. I don’t think you need to, though. You’ve obviously become a successful, decent human being in spite of the B.

  112. Tish says:

    >As a teacher myself (middle school) I say send it. There are some cruel people in this world, and some just so happen to be teachers. It’s a shame you went through what you went through. I experienced an evil teacher my 5th grade year, Mrs. Bettina. God she made my life a LIVING HELL. To this day I cannot forget her and will always make sure I’m nothing like her. Teachers, and I can contest, will have students they do not like, but since we are the adults and the professional, we must remain neutral and treat everyone the same. In the end, one may end up enjoying that student.Great post!

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