I'm Lindsay Ferrier, a Nashville writer with a passion for family travel, exploring Tennessee, and raising kids without losing my mind in the process. This is where I share my discoveries, along with occasional deep thoughts, pop culture tangents and a sprinkling of snark. Want to get in touch? Use the CONTACT form at the top of the page.
August 9, 2008
>Dear Friend,
Thank you for telling my husband you’re single again, and for informing him that the reason you wanted him to know was that I supposedly told you at a party a couple of months ago that I knew a bunch of “hot, single guys” I could set you up with.
As you can imagine, Hubs was thrilled to hear I had said that. Me? Well, I actually don’t remember that conversation at all and frankly suspect you confused me with someone else, but you can bet I assured Hubs IT WAS TOTALLY TRUE. And things haven’t exactly been easy for me since my confession.
Now that Hubs knows library story time is a “hot single guy” mecca, you can bet he’s going to be asking a whole lot more questions when I tell him I’m taking the kids there. He’ll want to know, for example, about that Calvin Klein underwear model who sits up front with the toddlers and laughs really loud at the puppets. Until now, Hubs had always assumed that only parents and children went to storytime. Heh. Sucker.
Hubs also managed to pry from me the mommy secret that children’s consignment sales might as well have signs on the door that say, “DAVID BECKHAM LOOKALIKES MEET HERE.” I mean, these things are practically infested with hot, single guys, checking out their reflections in Barbie mirrors and searching idly through racks of homemade hair bows. I had a knockdown brawl with one not long ago over a Hanna Andersson dress. He actually cried when I fucked up his bottled man tan with my french manicured claws.
So now you know, my newly single friend, why you can’t meet a man. They’re too busy dog paddling through the McDonalds ball pits, testing out strollers at Babies R Us, and singing circle songs at Gymboree. But I guess there are a few hot single guys I’m willing to share with you. Let’s start with these…
Yes, I always come through for a friend. Let’s get together for lunch soon and we can decide which of these hot, single guys is your best match.
LYLAS,
Lindsay
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>Okay, you just made me snort coffee all over my keyboard. Thanks for that. LOL
>I’m single again too. So uh, yeah, any of those guys will do.IF I GO BLIND.
>I haven’t seen anyone sign something “LYLAS” since my high school Yearbook. LOVE IT. We should like, totally bring it into corporate culture…
>I’m still laughing at the picture of an underwear model getting all pissed at having his tan scratched or smiling like a fool as he swims in the pit of balls… hahahaha… what a great way to start a Monday morning! hahahahaLYLAS!
>All I have to say is ROFLMAO. I know its silly, but its true!
>and I think we all know that’s why you’re not making the big bucks as the CEO on Match.com. Queen of make-me-spit-fluid-funny? Now that I’ll buy.
>Thanks for the laugh – Mondays always need them.
>Dibs on monkey man.
>Did you rig your site with smellovision or something? I swear those guys stink too! I think I need to take a shower now.
>Can’t. Stop. Laughing. You are such a good friend!!
>The guy with the pit-stain is also rocking a sweet pair of nut-huggers… Beware, single ladies, he may be available, but because of the tightness of his pants, he is very likely infertile.
>Okay, I REALLY didn’t know they would have cameras there. Honest!
>It must just be a Nashville thing–no guys were EVER that hot in PA.I think I may end up liking it here…
>Sigh. Welcome to the realities of being a single girl.
>Whoa whoa, not everyone meets their true love at McDonalds? I am floored.I hate to wonder what you googled to get those pictures…
>You might as well throw King Kong into the pot. What the hey…..
>Um, don’t take this the wrong way, but I think I’d rather be your enemy than your friend! LOL Those are some really HAWT doooods!!
>This post makes me VERY happy that I am married already.
>exactly which library do you frequent for storytime? just wondering….
>You never let me down. I always get a good giggle out of your stories.
>Lindsay, you’re always good for letting me know how out of touch and behind the curve I am:- I didn’t go to the library for kiddie time ‘cuz I didn’t want to be seed as a lurking pedophile; never thought I wuz missing out on a chick opp ;)- how’d you get my picture here (aka, Monkey Man)?
>Haven’t seen “Love Ya Like A Sister” in years! LOL
>Damn. Why I gotta be married with hawt like that available? hehe
>Don’t forget the single guys at Monkey’s Treehouse.
>Oh my, girl. You are hilarious. I see now why you get paid to write this kind of stuff.