>HIM: So how’s your back?
ME: It’s better, now that I’ve taken ibuprofen.
HIM: Oh good. I was worried about going to see The Color Purple tonight with your strained back.
ME: No need to worry! I found the heating pad and I’m bringing it with me!
HIM: …the heating pad?
ME: Yep! I’ve seen people bring a hemorrhoid pillow to a show- Why can’t I bring my heating pad?
HIM: And where are you going to plug it in?
ME: The wall, of course. I’m sure there’s an outlet somewhere.
HIM: It won’t reach.
ME: That’s why I’m bringing an extension cord!
HIM: …..
ME: OkayIloveyoubye!
(click)