I'm Lindsay Ferrier, a Nashville wife and mother with a passion for family travel, (mostly) healthy cooking, exploring Tennessee, and raising kids without losing my mind in the process. This is where I share my discoveries with you, along with occasional deep thoughts, pop culture tangents and a sprinkling of snark.
February 3, 2020
Ever look at an ad and wonder how they got that shot? Here’s a behind-the-scenes look at the HelloFresh shoot with Jessica Alba… IMAGINED BY ME.
“All right, everyone! Let’s get started. Ms. Alba has been kind enough to make time in her schedule for this shoot and she is due to arrive in 30 minutes; let’s do our best to be prepared and knock this out as efficiently as possible. Hedgerow, read me the ad copy for our shot, please.”
“We’re all crazy busy–Who has time to worry about dinner? HelloFresh is flexible enough to fit any schedule. Switch up your weekly recipes, and change your —”
“Thank you, Hedgerow, that’s enough. Key words here, people: Crazy busy. Crazy. Busy. Is there even one thing about this kitchen right now that supports the claim that The Actress Jessica Alba is ‘crazy busy?”
“Agathe! Our set stylist! Tell me what exactly went into your thought process here.”
“I mean, you asked me to find a modern, neutral kitchen and that’s exactly what I…”
“This, Agathe, is not the kitchen of a crazy busy woman!”
“But all you said was…”
“Silence! FIX IT!”
10 MINUTES LATER
“Okay, Agathe, Ms. Alba will be on set in exactly twenty minutes. What have you managed to come up with to support our client’s vision?”
“Uh, well, my assistant, Eowyn, had a bag of kids’ toys in the backseat of her car. I thought we could use these crayons and paper to draw a few pictures and put it all up on the fridge with these alphabet magnets, sort of like Jessica’s kids did it or something.”
“Yes… YES. Now we’re getting somewhere! Get to work on those drawings, Agathe! Now, what would a child draw? A rainbow perhaps, or a nice flower. A fish…”
“We have no time, Agathe! Don’t think. Just do. Yes, yes. That’s right. Color! Color as if your life depended on it! Wonderful. Okay, move that heart drawing up a bit. And don’t spell out any actual words with those magnets. Just pop them on the fridge in a manner that calls to mind CRAZY. BUSY. NESS. Yes! That’s it! Perfect.”
“And here is the fantastically stunning Ms. Alba now! Wonderful to see you again, my love. You look radiant, as always! How do you do it? I believe we have everything all ready for you. Hedgerow, bring out The HelloFresh Box. Now, Ms. Alba, I’ll have you stand here, just so. Perfect. Now, would you be so kind as to put your arm up on the box, and then sort of lean on it, like that? Wonderful. (click) Wonderful. (click) Yes. (click) Perfect. (click) And now that we’re warmed up, let’s try a few shots with you wearing the expression of one who is, oh I don’t know… Crazy busy perhaps? Oh! You say this is your crazy busy expression! Well, of course it is, love! (click) Wonderful! (click) (click) All right, let me take a look.
Hmm… Just one second, Ms. Alba…. Agathe!”
“Let’s keep our voices down. We don’t want to kill the vibe for Ms. Alba. It seems the magnets and drawings won’t be enough. We need something more to transform our model into a crazy busy American woman. Think. Think! We need…. I’ve got it! Pots and pans! Cookery! Quick, check the cabinets!”
“Oh there are no pots and pans here, I can guarantee it.”
“But this is a kitchen, Agathe, you dimwit!”
“A kitchen in L.A. No one cooks in L.A.”
“….I hadn’t thought of that. All right. Check with craft services and see what you can come up with. Quickly! Go! Ms. Alba, darling, let’s take a quick 5-minute break to refresh and restore ourselves.”
FIVE MINUTES LATER
“What do you have for me, Agathe?”
“A bowl of fruit.”
“A bowl of fruit. A bowl of fruit? ……… I love it! If this doesn’t say crazy busy, I don’t know what does! Place it there, just beneath the microwave. Yes. A little to the right. A little more… Perfect. Magnificent. Yes, Ms. Alba, we’re ready for you now. Okay, this time, I’m going to ask for a little more from you, love. Do you trust me? Do you? Good. I’m going to ask you to put BOTH arms atop The Box. (click) Yes, yes, just like that! (click) Oh, you’re marvelous! (click) Oh, I’m so happy! (click) The wondrous Ms. Alba! (click) And the fruit! (click) And the drawings… (click) (click) (click) This is my finest work! I’m absolutely convinced the women of America will see this image — and relate!
Darling girl, I believe we’ve got it! The money shot! You’re a wonder, a real marvel!
And now since we’re slightly ahead of schedule, let’s try something out of the box. I mean literally! Yes! I want you to take the product out of the box. Just for kicks! Yes, take it out! Take it all out! Ha ha!
I must say, I agree with you, Ms. Alba. Something definitely doesn’t feel right here. I don’t know what that is, either. Some sort of… exotic orange turnip, perhaps? And is that… an apple? A soft, squishy apple? Please don’t apologize, Ms. Alba. We can’t be expected to know what everything looks like before a chef gets his hands on it. Yes, food is weird and gross, you are absolutely right. Look, you tried your best with it, my darling, and that’s all that matters. Hedgerow, Agathe, put the product back in the box immediately! Don’t worry, Ms. Alba, we will not be using any food shots!
I think we’ve got what we need, my love. That’s a wrap, everyone! Applause for Ms. Alba and all her hard work today!
Group, I’m utterly convinced this campaign will deeply resonate with every crazy busy woman in America. Let’s give ourselves a hand!