I'm Lindsay Ferrier, a Nashville writer with a passion for family travel, exploring Tennessee, and raising kids without losing my mind in the process. This is where I share my discoveries, along with occasional deep thoughts, pop culture tangents and a sprinkling of snark. Want to get in touch? Use the CONTACT form at the top of the page.
March 9, 2011
>Yesterday, I tried to message a friend on Facebook, only to find that she had deleted her account.
So I did something completely archaic.
I called her on the phone.
“Yes, I got rid of my Facebook,” she admitted. “It was a time suck and it wasn’t good for me or my family. So now it’s gone. And I am more fully present.”
I loved hearing her admission, and I loved that she did something about it. Because this whole social networking/smartphone thing has been both a blessing and a curse for most moms I know.
Our Facebook pages and our smartphones allow us to keep in near constant contact with each other in a way that was never before possible. But they’re also addictive. Highly addictive. And while it would be unthinkable to say something to a mom friend about the fact that she seems to always be on Facebook, or that she spends too many of your playdates together with her eyes glued to her iPhone screen, I think we’d all admit that we’ve thought these things privately. Or maybe (gulp), others have thought them about us.
Facebook isn’t a problem for me, but as a diehard e-mail addict, I’m pretty sure an iPhone would be- and so, as I’ve written before, I don’t have one. I can’t send or receive e-mails on my cell phone. I can’t tweet from it and I’m horrible at texting. Only a handful of people even know my phone number.
I endure the teasing from my friends about my ridiculously uncool cell phone because when I’m out and about with my kids (or my friends), they have my full attention. It is my small step toward being there for my children while they still want me around. And yesterday, I took another step.
When I took my son to Cheekwood Garden here in Nashville yesterday, I wore workout clothes and running shoes. I know this sounds silly to some of you because you do this all the time, but too often, I wear clothes when I’m with him that are fine for trailing along behind him, but not fine at all for actually playing with him. And right now, playing is what he wants me to do.
Why, I wondered, do so many moms (including me) have no problem spending an hour on the elliptical, but shudder at the prospect of running and jumping and climbing with our kids? What would happen if I treated our outings as an extension of my workout? Wouldn’t everyone be happier?
And so yesterday, rather than following along behind my son as I’ve done too many times in the past, I ran beside him. I went hard with him for two hours and I was rewarded at the end of our playtime with an unexpected workout for me and a long nap for him. (Of course, he woke up at 4 this morning and wouldn’t go back to sleep, but let’s not talk about that part right now!)
I want to constantly challenge myself to step up my game when it comes to my kids. I’m taking small steps toward becoming a better mom- small steps that are less stressful and more realistic. Putting on running shoes was one. Another step I’m taking is to start now creating a game plan for our summer, one that I’m sharing with you here. My goal is to take a picture of each experience as it happens and post it beneath the activity. We probably won’t get through all of them, but at least I’ll have no excuse for spending a day doing nothing to engage my kids. And by making my list public, I’m holding myself accountable.
I’m going to challenge you to take a small step today toward becoming a better mom. It could be direct, such as having a Girl Power Hour or putting away your Droid for the afternoon– or it could be indirect, such as going to the gym or committing to a daily devotional time (two things that I firmly believe also make me a better mom). Share your step with me in the comments if you’d like- I love hearing your ideas. And feel free to share your own ideas for summer plans, as well. I could definitely use them!
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