>What to Expect When… Your Preschooler Drops the F-Bomb
>“FUCK!”
It came from the direction of the sunroom, where He Who Shall Not Be Named was sitting before the computer, staring angrily at the screen and cursing under his breath.
I cringed and glanced over at Punky, who was playing at the kitchen table. Hearing it, she looked up and gasped, then threw down her doll, ran to the sunroom and opened the door.
“FUCK!” she yelled in response, in the completely inappropriate way that only a four-year-old can yell, well, ‘fuck.’ She said it with an air of solidarity, as if to say, “I don’t know what the heck is going on, but I hear you, man! I’m with you!” It was almost touching. Almost. And, realizing that, I did what any good mother would do at that point. I ran.
“PUNKY FERRIER!” I shrieked, rounding the corner. “Never, ever, ever, ever say that word! Never say that word ever again!” I didn’t want to sound angry, because she clearly had no idea that she had just uttered the one word that would surely get her kicked out of every Sunday School in the state. Trying to stay calm, I kneeled in front of her. “Punky, that is an ugly word,” I said. “I never want to hear you say that word again, okay? That is the ugliest word of all!” She looked frightened and embarrassed. Emitting a choked cry, she turned and ran for her room.
That’s when He Who Shall Not Be Named emerged from the sunroom.
“What on earth?” I asked crankily.
“I was making non-refundable flight reservations for San Francisco,” He Who Shall Not Be Named said, “and I chose the wrong flight. I can’t believe it.”
“Did you hear Punky?” I asked.
“Yeah,” He Who Shall Not Be Named responded, shaking his head. “I feel really bad.” We talked for a moment more and agreed that if He Who Shall Not Be Named called Southwest and told them what happened, surely they’d let He Who Shall Not Be Named change the flight to the right one (and they did, in the end). Then I went to Punky’s room to check on her. She was lying in bed, her face to the wall.
“Punky?” I asked. “What’s wrong?”
She rolled over and looked at me plaintively. “I just feel so bad because I said fuck,” she said, frowning. “I feel so bad, Mommy.” It was one of those moments that probably will be funny some day. In fact, it’s actually kind of funny now, at least until I remember that it was my child who said it. My child, who believes every kid she meets wants to be her friend (and with that attitude, so far, she’s been right). My child who, when her doctor asked her what to do if a stranger tried to talk to her, responded, “Fight!” My child, whose very innocence is one of the most endearing things about her, and who was having some of that precious innocence taken from her right before my eyes as she processed for the first time that there were ugly words out there, bad words, words no one should say, but most especially not big girls.
Since that incident, Hubs and I have been far more careful with what’s said in front of Punky.
“I can’t believe that woman wouldn’t let us merge,” Hubs said on the road with the kids last night. “She was a total bi…” He paused. “Bee-yotch,” he said carefully, shooting me a meaningful look.
I looked back at him and sighed. Somehow, I don’t think bee-yotch is going to go over so well on the playground, either.
>Perhaps you should have also shrieked “HE WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED!! Never, ever, ever, ever say that word! Never say that word ever again!”. Just to be fair.
>Anytime an “ugly word” slips by, which is *gasp* very rare, and repeated, Mr. Schmitty and I will say, “that’s not what we said!” We said, “truck!” Or “shoot” Or “mustard” Or “basshole”. Okay, may not basshole…but we insist that those were indeed what we said and it always seems to work with the little ones. The older one, not so much.
>That is too funny. I was talking to my 2 year old niece yesterday about her brand new baby brother and she said “You know what Aunt Cass, this kid just won’t shut the hell up” and that’s when I knew for sure that she was in fact my brothers daughter…even if the blood is different.
>Yeah…my seven year old has called his little brother a dumbass TWICE. He heard it from Homer Simpson on the Simpson’s gamecube game at a friend’s house. NICE.
>My youngest was under two the first time he dropped the f-bomb (its my favourite word). I forgot something, and my usual curse is “Aaaawwww, FUCK”. That particular day though, I was trying to be careful and just said, “Aaaawwww…” and he finished with “FUCK!” All I could do was laugh.When they repeat my foul language, I don’t tell them it’s a “bad word”. I tell them it’s a grown-up word, that they shouldn’t use words like that until they’re a grown-up.
>Oh my. That’s pretty funny. When my younger daughter was four, she used to talk about “the little baby Jeeez-US!” Guess whose husband had to clean up his language while driving his little precious to school?
>My daughter went through a time when she said fuck all the time. And grammatically correct as well. Let’s see…we heard “F—ing Princess” when Sleeping Beauty’s hair wasnt just right. The train rolled off the train table in my mother’s basement….”f—ing train”. And when she couldnt get her sock on her foot, she threw it to the ground and yelled “f—ing sock!”. Classic. But just recently she upped the ante on herself. Check it out for yourself: http://supermom04.blogspot.com/2008/05/letter-f.html
>My oldest was with his grandma when his first ugly word slipped out. He was 3 and asked for a PB and J sandwich, she told him it was to close to supper and he looked her dead in the eye and said, “Well fu*k you then!” She slapped him before she thought about it. My mother doesn’t even swat kids, but it was such a shock. Needless to say, I had a LONG talk with my husband and then my son, My husband watched it for all of 3 days and to this day my I never heard my son say it again, he is 22 years old so I say, maybe that smack did the job. Not that I would ever suggest that you smack a child.
>At a traffic light the car next to us honked. My then three year old piped up “What the fuck is he doing mommy?” Sometimes being able to blame daddy is not enough. We are better about cursing now although my younger one is known to mutter “Jesus Christ! when frustrated. Where does he get that?
>Oh, that is funny! What is it with men? Last night my husband said “butt-head,” which was, of course, promptly repeated. It’s only a matter of time before the f-bomb is dropped in front of the 4-y/o!
>Just a suggestion, should you choose to go this route but spelling them out isn’t good either.My godson (2 yrs old) routinely drops stoff and says “Oh c.r.a.p.” and “Aw f.u.c.k.”.Kids are sponges at that age…..
>That is TOO funny! I made the mistake of saying “shit” in front of a kid I was babysitting a few years ago…man, that was bad. I couldn’t get him to stop saying it (he was 4)! Yeah, BEE-YOTCH probably wont make most people happy 😉 But it’s nice that he tried!
>In our house we have “mommy-daddy” words that you’re only allowed to say when you’re a mommy or a daddy. So far so good – although my oldest was very fond of “dammit.” My middle one refers to some people as “bizzies” because that’s what she heard when I said “bitches” – and that one’s cute, so we let it stick around.
>Well, you remember my story when J said it at the rec center sitting center? He was like 18 months old!
>Heh. Dawn, I had forgotten about that, but that was HILARIOUS!!
>My 3 year old attempted to drop the f-bomb. However, when she repeated it she said it as’fox’, not too long ago she fell off of swingset, looked up at me, and said, ‘what the fox mom??’
>One of the biggest challenges with parenting. I was caught saying some choice words at our dog Brandy after she did something bad that I can’t remember right now. So then my 3 year old started calling the dog “Damnit Brandy” for a couple days.
>Punky doesn’t (yet) read your blog, right? ;)Bruiser won’t be far behind…think of your kids as African Grey Parrots, just soaking up everything they hear. ‘Cept they don’t molt…Just like I did in my yoot LOL…
>From the time our kids were two or three, we would give them “point of clarification pardons” – yes we have always talked to our kids like that – where they were allowed to say a word a single time without us freaking out or them getting in trouble. We would use this time to explain the word, and if the word WAS a curse word, tell them that their point of clarification free pass was up.We use screen-it, and if a movie has but a single f-bomb, it’s off limits.We’ve never used the word in their presence because we just don’t use it in general. We’re not holier than thou, we just don’t care for the word.That being said, my son, at 11, now knows that the f-word is not “fart”, as we told him when he was smaller and asked about it. He still doesn’t know what it means, and he hasn’t asked for a point of clarification yet.My kids will through a period where they curse incessantly, and I expect it. I just think that when they do it, it should be rebellion, and not mimicry.
>In first grade, when they were working on rhyming words, and the word on the board was “duck,” Danger Boy raised his hand and said, “I’ve got a rhyming word but I don’t think you want me to say it.” Ya think?
>Ha, something we all go through as parents. I’ll never forget screaming “Son of a bitch!” when I dropped something on my foot. Thought the twins didn’t hear anything…they were two. Two days later, they were screaming “Son of a bitch!” when they couldn’t get a square peg into a round Fisher Price cobbler bench hole.
>My wife’s favourite expression is:”Fucker fucker fuck fuck.”I can’t wait.
>I don’t know…I think cunt is much worse than fuck. But I doubt I’d be thrilled to hear my under 13’s say either. I sort of expect teens to curse incessantly–kind of a coming of age thing.
>Well, FUCK, Lindsey! :)What is with the new picture? You’re so hot in that picture you’re intimidating ME, and I don’t swing that way. That is a great picture of you, love it!
>I once heard my eldest say to my middle, “Dammit C!” in the EXACT tone that I use with the dog. That hurt.
>Oy. I have taught my kids most of the words that get them in trouble at day care…and it’s my poor husband that has to clean up my messes…
>Yeah…this one is hitting home and my guy is only 8 months old. We recently got a Wii AND MarioKart. Let’s just say there are words out there that I didn’t even know existed.
>It’s “dammit” for my daughter too. Under the breath, not too often, for little frustrations. It only pops up every few months, so it’s under fair control.
>Mine doesn’t talk yet, but being around my best friend’s now 6 & 4 year olds has helped me change my language a lot. My favorite was when her then 5 year old turned to her 3 year old brother at dinner and told him to “Eat his fucking food”!
>I’m proud to say that my kids have learned all of their bad words from me, not their dad. He has a lot more self control than me.
>Wow my kid’s first curse was ‘Chit’ I think you can guess what she meant. Whenever she was mad at something she would say chit! it was too funny. I don’t know where she heard it because I don’t curse and neither does my hubby. I use silly words to express myself like oh poopy!Reminds me of that cute kid who explains to her mother that she’s gonna have to kick the monsters “ask” because if she doesn’t the monster is gonna kick her “ask” check it out on you tube it’s too funny.
>Baby, I’ve been there. At least Punky didn’t drop the F-bomb AT CHURCH. Yeah. That fucking sucked. Love your new photo, you look so pretty!!
>When my second daughter was 5, she was playing and something happened. She dropped her toy or whaever didn’t go her way. She turned around and said Fuck. My husband was sitting at the computer and stopped what he was doing and just looked at her. He didn’t know how to respond. So he sent her to her room and said mommy would deal with it when she came home. So as she was walking up the stairs, she said it again. My husband just looked at her and she goes “What?? I’m already grounded…” I didn’t find it all that funny then…she actually got to suck on a bar of soap for that one, especially since she knows the word is bad and knows not to say it once, none the less, a second time. I can chuckle about it now…but then…ooohhh…she’s lucky I didn’t plant her little butt in the wall.
>We try to use substitute “ugly words” in our house, but even that backfires. For example, once recently I was doing something (again!) that was annoying my three year old. He looked at me and said totally deadpan, “you’re a FREAKIN’ girl.” BWAH! How do you not giggle at that?Once when our older boys were maybe 5 and 7, I overheard them talking with two other boys the same age. “I know what the baddest word of all is,” my youngest son offered. “It’s FOCK.” Rhymes with sock. Heee!
>I’m with gertie :-)We haven’t dealt with that word yet, but princess did ask me what A ‘Bitch’ was and then 5 minutes later asked me if her outfit was ‘Hot’?Oy.I’m banning all forms of media except books and I’m attaching shock wires to my hubs’ goodies so that should he cuss, he’ll hear and feel my wrath ;-0