>Dos and Don’ts for Teenagers Sleeping Over at a Friend’s House

I’ve hosted a lot of sleepovers here at Chez Ferrier. Here’s a quick guide for tweens and teens I’ve compiled from hundreds of overnight experiences. Feel free to add your own dos and don’ts in the comments.

DO look your friend’s mom in the eye when you see her and thank her for allowing you to spend the night.

DON’T simply slink mutely past your friend’s mom, eyes downcast. Just what are you hiding, missy?

DO clean up after yourself when staying with a friend. Pick up your dishes and take them to the sink. Throw your trash away.

DON’T leave your crap everywhere for your friend’s mom to pick up herself. And for God’s sake, DON’T leave behind your purse in your friend’s mom’s car, with a pack of cigarettes clearly visible inside, unless you want your friend’s mom to take those cigarettes and run over them in the Kroger parking lot. Hypothetically speaking, of course.

DO dress appropriately. Did you know, for example, that slightly loose-fitting clothes make you look thinner, while skin-tight clothing makes you look like a sausage spilling out of its casing?

DON’T show up at your friend’s house in a tarty halter top and short shorts. It’s 40 degrees outside, for heaven’s sake. What were you thinking? And why did your mom even let you buy that stuff? What was she thinking? Who is this woman, anyway?

DO thank your friend’s mom for driving you to McDonalds, the movies, the mall, and on to your house.

DON’T you dare get out of your friend’s mom’s car after all that driving and not say one stinking word to her. She will stare at you for a long moment as you walk to your front door, then shake her head at the wolves that must be raising you who live inside.

DO take a moment to make conversation with your friend’s parents. A short chat will make those parents adore you and want to have you over more often.

DON’T chat with your friend about a) how much you hate your parents, b)how far you went with Chuck at last night’s kegger, or c) how easy it was to cheat on Friday’s Chemistry exam. You may be sitting in the backseat and your friend’s mom may have her back to you, but that doesn’t mean she CAN’T HEAR EVERY WORD YOU’RE SAYING, NIMROD.

This post originally appeared on Parents.com.