>Good Girls Go to Heaven…
>The other day, a commenter wrote, “Do you like anyone?” As in, “Do you like anyone?” Or “Do you like anyone?”
The answer, my anonymous friend, is yes. But the stories about people I like don’t seem to be that interesting. Still, I’ll try anything once… Here goes.
My friend Dawn e-mailed me yesterday to tell me she liked my new haircut. Then she said she was thinking of getting layers.
Um.
I got to have lunch with Kelly last Saturday. We both had salads and chatted about a lot of things we can’t write about on our blogs.
Uhhh…
Punky started her second semester of dance class yesterday and I spent the entire 45 minutes telling another mom about all the free stuff there is for preschoolers in Nashville. She said she had moved from Ft. Lauderdale, where she couldn’t find anything fun for preschoolers.
Oh screw it. I might as well stick with what’s interesting.
People I could do without.
Okay, so remember Gym Mom? Out of the hundreds and hundreds of parents who use the nursery at my YMCA, she is literally the only one who’s ever made me want to poke my eyes out with a stainless steel chopstick. And while I try to give everyone a second or even a third chance, I think Gym Mom has racked up something along the lines of 137 chances now. Yesterday, she made it to 138.
I arrived in the lobby of the nursery to find a quiet battle taking place, with Gym Mom and her husband facing off against the nursery workers. One of Gym Mom’s sons was standing in between them, bawling his head off and coughing the unmistakable cough of croup.
CROUP.
“I don’t know,” Gym Mom was saying. “It’s a tough call. He might just be upset.”
“He seems a little sick,” one of the workers said. Nobody moved. It was a passive aggressive showdown. I paused in the doorway and waited for it to play out. There was no way I was going to be able to drop off my recently-recovered-from-pneumonia son in the nursery if a kid was in there with croup.
The kid kept crying.
And coughing.
“Hmmmmmm,” Gym Mom said slowly. “Maybe he might be a little off.” She continued standing there, as if the workers would give up and just let her son in if she waited long enough. Meanwhile, her son drew in a deep breath with the barking noise of a seal.
“That doesn’t sound good,” one of the workers said politely.
“I guess it could be something,” Gym Mom’s husband said. “It’s really close though.”
“It’s a really close call,” Gym Mom agreed. More silence from the adults. More crying and gasping from the kid. Finally, she gave in.
“All right, Connor, we’re going home,” she sighed. “There could be something to this. Maybe.” Unwilling to admit complete defeat, she looked back up at the nursery workers. “It was really close though,” she said. “Right on the line.”
Convinced the kid was headed home, the workers nodded understandingly. “Really close,” they echoed.
As she walked out the door, I pumped my fists in the air. “YES!” I shouted. “Score one for the millions of tiny victims of moms who bring their sick kids to nurseries and other people’s homes!!” YES!! YESSSSSSS! BOO-ya!” I did a little dance and then signed my kids in to a germ-free nursery.
Once they were in, I headed out onto the packed gym floor in search of others to entertain me with their buffoonery. And that’s what I wrote about in this week’s newspaper edition of Suburban Turmoil.
Along with my own buffoonery. Which I’m sure you won’t find the slightest bit funny. Because personal buffoonery is a very serious matter.
>Oh Lindsay – You just have the courage to say what we are all thinking about those annoying people – and you say it so much better than we could!
>The Green Hills YMCA is experiencing the same dilemma with those “resolute” individuals filling the parking lot, lifting weights that are obviously too heavy, and attempting to outrun Usain Bolt on the treadmills. Welcome back to the workout wagon.
>So not only does Gym Mom suck as a parent and a person, so does Gym Dad. Wow. That poor kid, stuck with TWO parents who put themselves ahead of their kid’s health. I see years of therapy in the wee one’s future.
>You are a much better person than I am because I totally would have called them out of that.As soon as that kid coughed like a barking seal I would have said “Uh-oh the barking seal cough — you know that means croup. don’t you??!!??”. I’m sure the gym employees would have loved some backup.I just don’t understand parents who need to workout so bad – BOTH OF THEM – that they would send their sick child to the YMCA daycare. That’s just horrible!!!
>I feel most sorry for Gym Mom’s kids. Neither parents seems to give a crap about them. I’d be terrified if my kid had croup!! I certainly wouldn’t be out at the effing gym.
>Hey Lindsay,I remember those days! Gym Moms suck!Kath
>Our YMCA workers came and found me on the treadmill the other day because they were concerned my son’s red cheeks were a sign he had Fifth’s Disease.I assured them that it was not. It was actually rug burn from sliding his face around on the carpet as he slithered under the bed. But I appreciated that they noticed and took action. Go YMCA.
>I need to move to Nashville. Where I live, we don’t have such great public health screeners working to protect our children from evil germ spreading parents.@ Kathryn. I may have spoken up but I know my wife would have spoken up and agreed with the Y folks. And yes, any confirmation would have helped the situation. If I was to speak up, one thing I would certainly say is, “NO, it’s not close, you kid is sick and YOU need to go home or to a doctor and take care of them.” I’m not shy.I am awarding sucko GYMmom and GYMdad, MOY and POY awards, respectively. (Mother of the Yearand Father of the Year). Anytime my best friend witnesses bad parenting he says loudly, “There is another POY/MOY award.”
>I’m proud of the YMCA folks for saying something! Every time my girls are in the church nursery, MOPS childcare, or the gym nursery they end up with some kind of yuck. Good for them for not letting him in!
>I worked in a volunteer nursery for some time, and I can’t tell you how many times the parents would just look dumbfounded when I declined to let their kids in. It was as if I was suddenly clueing them in to the fact that their kids were DEATHLY ILL, and they had no idea.. Good grief.
>Er, croup, as it was explained to me by the emergency room pediatrician, is not contagious. It’s not a virus, or a bacteria that you can catch.It’s simply when a child’s throat swells shut in response to irritants in the air, dryness, and usually in conjunction with the common cold which makes the throat more sensitive. It’s treated by reducing the swelling in the throat. Either with steroids in extreme cases, or just cold air, popsicles, ice water etc.Gym moms’ kids probably had a run of the mill cold, and a really swollen throat. Most definitely should not have been in day care nonetheless due to the cold and obvious suffering but still, I thought I’d point that out.My kids can get croup even if they aren’t sick with anything else, and I get the glares when they cough like that, but I swear it’s not contagious.
>Croup – contagious or not, leads to a lot of coughing, which, by it’s very nature, spreads germs. The poor kid should have been at home with a humidifier, not tossed in the nursery at the gym! Good for the Nashville YMCA – working out isn’t exactly tantamount to survival.
>Holy crap, I just scanned this post because I can’t concentrate because I have 3 hours of sleep because my daughter got the croup from the Y. Must be free w/ membership this month. (Did I just write because 3 times in one sentence)?
>LMAO…diss away, Lindsay. It is more entertaining.My last visit to the gym had me spend 20 minutes of my total time listening to a moron on my left, trying to work out while barking like a seal (a 30 something wearing a new sweat suit…one of those NY resolution types, probably). Two other work-outers abandoned their equipment and moved to other areas, shaking their heads…I just turned up the headphones a few more decibels ;)So far, I’ve yet to biff on a piece of exercise equipment. Must be saving a doosy for someone like you to write about LOL…
>Is this the same person who complained last week that someone gave her coughing son the evil eye?
>As I tell all my favorite people: “If you have nothing nice to say…come sit by me.”You make me smile, every single morning.
>Holy shittola. Normally I don’t call Child Protective Services on someone unless they are close to Hitleresque. But umm, this Gym Mom has already pushed the envelope up to 138 chances. Maybe it’s time to take action. And this I say before I’ve even read the original Gym Mom post, which I’m about to do now.You know, I bet Gym Mom even rubs Vicks Vaporub on that poor kid. Selfish bish, she is. P.S. Those Y people so need so grow some balls.
>My daughter had that nasty cough this week. It was awful. The worst part about it is that there was no fever so I KNOW there were parents who allowed their kids to spread the germs because, heck, there is no fever! No fever, no problem!I’m glad the nursery at your Y was tough with the lady without calling her out. I mean, they do have to be customer oriented.
>Re: City Paper articleI bumped into my chisel instructor about 3 weeks after our baby was born. Here I was looking worse than doughy in ill fitting clothes and she told me I looked great! She didn’t even know I’d had a baby b/c I was so sick this pregnancy I stopped going before I was showing. You can bet your ass I told her I had a 3 week old at home and I’d be back at the gym after RSV season was over.
>I consider “personal buffoonery” an oxymoron. Not the type of moron like Gym Mom.
>CarrienCroup is almost always caused by a virus or bacterial infection. Classically paraflu 1.The virus is contagious, the manifestation is variable. ya got to catch it somewhere.
>I’m a bit ashamed to admit it, but I share many smug eye rolls with other “gym vets” over the crush of new people in January. “Don’t worry, by Feb, half these people will be gone, and Bodypump will be much less crowded!”Also, I happen to be a Pilates instructor, so if you ever feel like making good on last year’s resolution, it’s never too late!;)www.trypilates.com
>I actually jumped a patient (not literally) becuase he was dropping his kid off after his appointment and heading to the gym. The poor little guy was flush and as stuffy as anything. I told him that if he decided to go to his workout and put his kid in the day care, he better cross train becuase I was coming to get him.I said it with a smile though, I’m pretty sure he got the point. In situations like yours the person with higher personal conviction will always win.