I'm Lindsay Ferrier, a Nashville writer with a passion for family travel, exploring Tennessee, and raising kids without losing my mind in the process. This is where I share my discoveries, along with occasional deep thoughts, pop culture tangents and a sprinkling of snark. Want to get in touch? Use the CONTACT form at the top of the page.
August 19, 2009
>Hell has a new name around here, and it’s known as Car Rider Pick-Up.
Somehow in all the excitement, I had managed to forget this most torturous part of the back-to-school experience. Years ago, both my stepdaughters went to the same school that Punky is now attending. On Fridays, I picked them up. That meant driving a couple of minutes to school and then sitting for at least a half-hour, waiting to collect them.
It was bad enough back then, one day a week.
But now, I’m expected to do this every damn day.
The first day that Punky returned to school, I was under the impression that because SIX YEARS had passed since I’d had kids there, surely, surely they’d managed to streamline the pick-up system.
Um. No.
I arrived twenty minutes early and still found myself waiting in a long line behind at least a hundred other cars.
Forty-five minutes later, I strapped Punky into her carseat. Seriously. I wasted 45 minutes of my life staring at the blank brick wall of a school building. As an added bonus, Bruiser took that opportunity to fall asleep, thereby robbing me of his at-home naptime, which I rely on in order to, you know, stay sane.
The next day, I arrived much earlier, with a magazine for myself and a portable DVD player for Bruiser. This time, I made it into the initial two lanes of cars in front of the school. After about 25 minutes, Punky came outside, I hopped out and collected her, quickly strapped her in, and got behind the wheel with a relieved sigh, ready to be on my way.
The only problem was that the car ahead of me wasn’t moving. That was because the car ahead of her… was empty.
I watched as the lane beside us emptied and new cars took their places. Then those moms got out and went to collect their kids. And then they left, and more cars took their places.
Finally, five minutes later, the woman two cars up from me ambled back to her empty car. She had been chatting with friends in front of the school.
Suddenly, I understood why road rage happens. If I didn’t feel so strongly that my kids need a mother at home, I might be in jail right now.
And that would be a good place to end this post, with me feeling disgruntled about wasting two and a half hours per week sitting in a freaking parking lot. But this is Suburban Turmoil, after all.
It must get worse. I mean, you wouldn’t expect any less, right?
That means that this year, the new principal had an idea. “Let’s make the parents wait A WHOLE HOUR for their kids!” she said evilly, rubbing her hands and cackling in her office.
At least, that’s how I picture it.
Starting yesterday, each child was called out one by one, by number, as their parents arrived outside. We’re talking hundreds of children, people. While I sat waiting for Punky in the school parking lot, a new president was elected, man landed on Mars, and Suri Cruise grew up and married one of the Gosselin kids.
I’m not even joking.
What’s worse, supposedly if your child does not hear his number when it’s called, you have to drive on around and go to the back of the carpool line, thus waiting another 30 minutes. My child is in kindergarten. Her number is long.
This is a disaster waiting to happen.
Already yesterday, children weren’t coming out and parents were understandably refusing to leave without their kids. Once I’d collected my daughter, I had to drive through an obstacle course of abandoned cars in the drive-through lane, just to get out of the parking lot.
So if you don’t hear from me on this blog for a while, you’ll know where I am.
Still waiting to pick up my daughter from school.
This message sponsored by the Home School Association of America.*
*Just kidding. About the Home School Association of America. Not about the car rider situation, although SWEET JANE, I wish I was.
OH, and I’m giving away ANOTHER $500 VISA gift card this week! YES, REALLY! Go enter!
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