>The Cold War
>I apologize for not writing very much this week. Baby’s birthday party is Sunday and since I spent most of last week lying around honking into a handkerchief and feeling sorry for myself, that leaves this week to get the house ready and the presents and balloons and cake bought for an extravaganza of epic proportions.
An extravaganza that does not allow for the guest of honor to catch her mommy’s cold.
Now. You guys have amazed me with your willingness to overlook my faults. When I set my sex-crazed dog on an annoying 12-year-old, you were all supportive. When I inadvertently taught my toddler to say “fuck,” you were unanimously forgiving. But this time, Internet, I think I’ve got you!
Today, Baby has a bit of a runny nose. Ten children are coming here Sunday. If Baby has indeed caught my cold, do I call everyone and cancel the party?
Hell, no.
In my defense, that’s not what I said originally.
“We can move it to next Sunday,” I murmured to Hubs this morning as we analyzed the color and amount of Baby’s snot.
“Next Sunday is Easter,” he replied.
“Okay, two Sundays from now,” I said. “No one will mind.”
“The girls will be at their mother’s in two weekends.”
“Shit.”
At that moment, I decided, Ladies and Gent, that the show must go on. Baby has been talking about this party for weeks. I cannot let her down. And besides, I have a baby book to update. A baby book that demands pictures of a “Happy Second Birthday” party. So yes, you can finally say it. I am quite possibly the World’s Bitchiest Mom (Under 3 Division).
And I’m stifling my guilty feelings by thinking about the birthday party we went to last Sunday, in which all of the toddlers present (some of whom will be at Baby’s party) sported freely running noses. Those moms didn’t cancel. So why should I?
It doesn’t work, though. I feel guilty. Guilty as hell.
But I’m still hoping that Baby doesn’t have a cold at all. So keep your fingers crossed for me, ‘kay?
>Cold, Schmold. I guaran-fucking-tee that at least half of the children who attend will have snot trails coming out of their noses and they will wipe their faces on your living room couch. You will not be noticed. Party On.
>yes, and you are not the only one responsible for this decision, so move that guilt elsewhere! I bet Hubs isn’t nursing a guilty conscience! But I do get it. I took my babes to a playgroup last week with drippy noses, mostly because I could NOT face a long morning with them alone, and I was so afraid of the evil looks I would get from other mommies. When I got there, about half the other kids were drippy too. Every time a little kiddie cough or snot appeared, moms hastily swabbed or averted their eyes. This guilt thing hits us all, but the truth is, cold season is here and unless we lock ourselves up for months, we can’t avoid it. We all know this. So let’s (together) get out of the guilt trap.
>I’m just tickled by the image of you wiping your nose on the sofa that the Misfit Hausfrau’s comment has left with me. Bring on the distribution of germs I say.
>It’s just a cold. You can’t lock down your life for such minor things, only the major ones like the flu. Besides, it’s good for everyone’s immune systems. If they weren’t exposed to minor germs, then when the major ones come they’d really be in trouble. Just blow her nose before she blows out the candles.
>Happy Second Birtday to the little one! I am runny too! SNIFF!
>I would so totaly do exactly the same….
>lol thats bad!!!! You know what to put in the goodie bags now though,,, kleenex and some childres tylenol!
>If she doesn’t have a fever it doesn’t count as real sickness. That’s my rationale. Otherwise we’d never go anywhere or do anything.And whatever, you are so not a bitchy mom. You’re planning a birthday extravaganza! Bitchy would be not cancelling until the day of the party when the guests show up with gifts on your doorstep and you say, “I’m sorry. Baby’s not feeling well today. So you can just leave your gift with me and we’ll be in touch.”
>Fingers crossed.
>I think you are fine as long as she doesn’t have a fever and isn’t obviously wretchedly ill. Maybe you could give her a little Tylenol Cold & Cough (baby formula) before the event so she wouldn’t be coughing on her little guests. I do try to keep my kids away from other kids who are obviously spreading germs, but, as you note, lots of parents are not conscientious about keeping their sick kids home, so when contact occurs, I just decide that they are building immunity to even nastier germs. Enjoy the party!!
>I’m sorry Lucinda, but if Baby is laid ass out on the couch like those pics you posted the last time she was sick…well, you’re going to have a hard time fooling people! HA! Especially if she goes with the One Sock Couture like last time! ;-)Hang in there and hopefully Baby isn’t sick at all. *crosses everything crossable*
>Uhm…Maybe you caught the cold you just had from the snotty-nosed kids at that party you went to last Sunday?Just a thought.
>Hell, I wouldn’t cancel the party. I’d dope her up on cold medicine, prop her up in the corner and eat all the cake I could get my hands on.But that’s just me.
>She’s only “sick” if she’s got a raging fever, dripping green snot or upchucking (or the backside equivilant) everywhere. Runny noses and a mild fever don’t count. Dose her up with a non-drowsy antihistimine beforehand. And if anyone comments, tell them with it being spring and all Baby has some allergies.You’ll live with mommy-guilt your whole life. The trick is finding ways to get around it.
>Ha, look….seems as though you don’t “got us”. We are still all quite supportive of you girl! I say, have the party. Ignore the guilt. I mean it was probably at that other party where you guys picked up that cold in the first place, right?! It will be fine. The show must go on. I hope your little girl has a fabulous Second Birthday!
>the therapist is in: by actually skipping the party you really could be causing harm to Baby’s development and trust. it’s the time where children are learning right and wrong (or beginning to) and if you flake, then trust issues happen. did that make sense? Nut didn’t sleep last night and I had an intense day at work today.
>What we moms have to go through! I vote that all the attendees wear festive party clown noses – cover up and snot catcher all in one.
>I say if she’s getting sick today, she won’t be contagious on Sunday. Go ahead and have the party and don’t worry about it, K?The doctor has spoken. Five cents, please.
>Okay I won’t take away from your guilt or worry but it’s so NOT a big deal. I have 3 kids and no matter where you go they are germs, sick germs and I think most parents are understanding. Oh except for the hacking kids, who really should be at home. People who hack cough scare me.Anyways if she’s feeling well and just has a runny nose, then I think it’ll be fine. Anyway you just have to pay extra attention to the runny nose and maybe ply her full of some medicine to stop the “running”.Your a great mom lol. Anyway a runny nose isn’t sick lol.
>No fever? No problem.Besides, they’ll have all week to recover!
>Fingers are crossed.
>Wow, you guys are so supportive. I am simultaneously relieved and horrified by the lot of you. And, Peanut’s Mom, I certainly don’t want her to have trust issues over the cancellation of the party! That settles it. It’s on.The good news is that she seems to have a much milder version of the cold than mine, with a slightly runny nose and nothing else.
>I had three kids under two and I swear for the first five years of life, I didn’t realise that kids DIDN’T normally have runny noses…Guilt? Bleugh!Only get guilty when vomit, fever or pneumonia is involved….And before I get spammed, that was MEANT to be a joke…
>Have the party. I’ve lost count of how many times Simon has gotten sick by going somewhere because, inevitably, there is another ‘snotty nosed’ kid running amok. There is no way of containing snot, most parents understand that is the hazard of having a 2-5 year old. Now, if it was small pox or something, I understand…but a cold? Party like it’s 1999, girlfriend!
>I used to worry about that issue myself. I’d cancel parties, not take the kids to parties, warn all the parents that my kid had a cold, and then I realized I was the only person who gave a damn.
>I think It is Written that the only reason to cancel a child’s birthday party is for Bubonic Plague. All other illnesses are TOTALLY acceptable!Happy Birthday Baby!
>I knew this would happen. As long as she doens’t break out in spots you can claim it’s seasonal allergies.
>Have the party, keep the cold medicine flowing, but you might want to think about having a small cake for her to have on her own – you know green boogers covering the cake when the candles are blown out might not go over well!!
>I must be a horrible mom too…I’ve had parties with colds abound in the house myself. Doesn’t matter anyway – even when everyone was healthy, my brother’s wife (yeah, yeah, SIL…I hate to call her that sometimes, because it makes her seem closer to me than she really is) – she still blames us if one of her kids gets sick. Forget the fact that she takes them to school with her while she is performing her Class Mom duties; or takes them to McD’s, stores, etc.. Oh no. It’s always Lisa’s fault. :pHope her party was a great time!