I'm Lindsay Ferrier, a Nashville writer with a passion for family travel, exploring Tennessee, and raising kids without losing my mind in the process. This is where I share my discoveries, along with occasional deep thoughts, pop culture tangents and a sprinkling of snark. Want to get in touch? Use the CONTACT form at the top of the page.
July 4, 2011
When the phone rang on that fateful morning, I picked up the receiver, wondering if my life was about to change forever.
“Hello?” I asked hopefully.
“Hi! I’m with Nick Jonas,” the voice on the other end of the line said. “Just wanted to let you know he’ll be calling you in about 20 minutes.”
“Okay!” I said. “I’ll be here.”
Believe or not, this wasn’t a dream. It was reality.
Nick Jonas was calling. THE NICK JONAS. Of the Jonas Brothers. He was calling me. On the phone.
What would my husband say?!
I had no time to think about that. I had to be ready for what could be the most important phone call of my life!
Quickly, I went upstairs, sat down at my vanity and put on some lipstick. I smiled at myself in the mirror, and paused to rub the red smears off my front teeth.
“Hello, Nick,” I said importantly, gazing at myself. It came out a bit scratchy. I cleared my throat and tried again. “Hello, Nick.” Much better. “Hello, Nicky,” I continued, with a hint of a Russian accent. Nice. “Hello, Little Nicky.” “Helloooooo.”
I was no Kathleen Turner, but it would have to do. I powdered my nose, put on a little blush, and popped in a breath mint.
I was ready.
A few minutes later, the phone rang. I let it ring twice before I picked up. I didn’t want Nick Jonas to think I, you know, cared.
“Hello?” I squeaked when I finally answered, completely forgetting all I had practiced. Damn.
“Thflsr sk dkfrorf gff preh dmmrs,” a man said. I paused. That certainly didn’t sound like Nick Jonas, although frankly I had no idea what Nick Jonas sounded like. What to do?! WHAT TO DO?!
“Huh?” I said finally.
“I said, this is Victor for Nick Jonas.”
What? Victor? Was this some kind of test?
“Oh,” I said warily. “Okay. Hi, Victor.”
“Here’s Nick, you have three minutes,” Victor said. There was some shuffling and then I heard The Voice.
Have you ever heard an angel say hello? No? Me neither. But I imagine it sounds a lot like when NICK JONAS CALLS LINDSAY FERRIER ON THE PHONE. (That was for the SEO.)
“Hi Nick, I’m Lindsay Ferrier,” I said. I smiled smugly. What would he say to that? That he loves my blog? That he wants to write a song about me and needs my permission? That he celebrated his first birthday the same year I graduated from high school? I started to sweat a little.
“Hi,” he said.
“Uh, okay!” I continued. “I have a few questions, so let’s just dive right in. What made you decide to get involved in the Quaker Chewy Superstar Search?”
“We wanted to find a way to combine fans of the snack with fans of music,” he answered, “and find a new music superstar for the world.” I nodded sagely. This guy knew his stuff.
“So many kids think that being famous just means posing for pictures, going to parties and making music videos,” I continued. “How hard should they expect to have to work if they really want to ‘make it’ in the industry?” I chuckled to myself. This was a trick question!
“It’s a lot of hard work,” Nick replied. “The perks can come with it if you make good decisions as an artist, but it’s really more about being passionate and caring about your craft.” My mouth dropped open as he finished his answer. Nick Jonas had seen past my ploy and given the correct answer. The kid was smarter than I thought. It was time to step up my game.
“What are some things kids should consider doing if he/she wants to stand out to judges when submitting a video for the Quaker Chewy Superstar Search?” I challenged him.
“Pick the right song– the one that’s right for your voice,” he responded quickly. “It’s all about making it your own.” Ours was a volley worthy of Wimbledon.
“One last question,” I said. It was Final Jeopardy time. “What advice do you have for parents whose children want to be an actor or recording artist?”
“Support your kid’s dreams and be as passionate as they are about it,” he said. “I’m blessed to have parents that always let me follow my dreams, and it was really good for me.” I imagined confetti raining down on Nick Jonas on the other end of the line. He had passed my interview challenge with flying colors.
“Well, you’ve answered all my questions,” I said respectfully. “Thanks, Nick.”
“‘Bye,” he answered. I could swear I heard his eye twinkle just before he hung up the phone.
Of course, we appeared to be talking about the Quaker Chewy Superstar Search, a competition for kids between the ages of 8 and 14 to win a recording contract with Jonas Group Management and $5,000 dollars in cash. And we were. The Superstar Search is, after all, a cool way for kids with pipes to enter online or in person to be the next big singing sensation, and you can read all the details here if you have a child who’s into this kind of thing.
But Nick is also clearly an expert at speaking in code, and I, as many of you know, am a master decoder. So after a few hours of mulling over his responses and rearranging certain words and letters, I was able to decipher Nick’s true personal message to me:
Please I want to sing many duet with you. For this privilege I give to you millions of dollars.
And while I have to say, Nick Jonas, that I’m flattered and I could certainly use the money, unfortunately I’m going to have to decline. For one thing, I’m married and I don’t have the kind of husband who would be happy about me singing duets with anyone but him. And then there’s the fact that I have children who really need me at home. The truth, Nick, is that my family is worth more to me than all the money in the world.
So thanks for your phone call. It was fun, really it was. But I’m going to have to ask you to take me off your speed dial now. When some teenage punk hacks into your cell phone and your call log is published on TMZ, I’ll just die if my name is on it.