>The Problem with Pageants
>So yesterday, I wrote about the funny side of my baby pageant experience. But to be honest, it was hard to laugh about.
One woman I spoke to for a few minutes at the beginning of the pageant had a just-turned-two-year-old girl with her. Like the other contestants, Katelynn wore a wigful of curls, false lashes and a sprayed on tan. But her mom seemed nice enough, so Baby and I settled in to watch them compete in the first round together.
As Katelynn’s mom carried her up on the stage, the little girl burst into tears. Her mother grimaced and shook her daughter stiffly, trying to make her stop. Of course, Katelynn cried harder. Impatiently, her mother whipped her around to face the judges, then jerked her back and stalked off the stage when it became clear that the tears weren’t going to stop any time soon. As they walked past me in the audience, Katelynn’s mom didn’t speak to or look at her daughter. Her face was an awful mask of anger and disappointment.
Round two was no better. This time, Katelynn’s mother had to stand behind the judges as Katelynn walked onto the stage by herself for a dance routine. Hit with the spotlight and the music, set at eardrum-bursting volume, Katelynn froze before the judges and timidly smiled, bouncing slightly, for the entire minute-and-a-half. At first, her mother wildly pantomimed Katelynn’s routine from the audience, but when it became clear that her daughter wasn’t going to dance, she threw her hands up in exasperation and walked away from Katelynn’s sight line. Katelynn walked to the side of the stage when the music stopped and her mother harshly grabbed her and went to angrily vent to some of the pageant coaches nearby.
I felt sick. How could a child who just turned two be expected to smile and perform on cue? And why was her mother so angry when she didn’t? Surely she knew this might happen. All of us with toddlers know that the moment we most want them to display their knowledge of the alphabet or “Twinkle Twinkle” is the moment they choose not to perform.
I learned later that Katelynn and her mother and baby sister had flown in from Texas for the pageant, spent around $800 for the pageant entrance fee, and thousands of dollars more for airfare and hotel, pageant coaches (who’d also come in from out of town for the event), custom-made costumes, professionally done hair and makeup and manicures and tanning. I’m sure that Katelynn’s mom wasn’t seeing her daughter up there on stage; she was seeing thousands of dollars being flushed down the toilet. And this mother wasn’t alone. I saw plenty of parents’ faces contort in anger when their toddlers forgot a routine, neglected to remove a hat or vest, or cried on stage. It was fucking pathetic. And fucking wrong.
I don’t use the term ‘child abuse’ lightly, but I felt like what I was seeing should not have been happening under any circumstances. I can’t tell you how many two and three-year-old girls approached my daughter, clearly wanting to play with her as she hopped across the carpet and munched on Goldfish. These girls, though, had obviously been trained over a long period of time not to move. They would stand a few feet away in their perfect hair and makeup and costumes, looking at her longingly, but not daring to approach her. Any of you who have or have had a two-year-old know that this kind of behavior in an entire group of toddlers isn’t natural. It’s learned behavior and it’s sick.
The contestants in national “glitz” pageants in no way resemble little girls. They are made up to look like little women, dressed up in bikinis, their wispy hair covered by full-length Barbie-esque wigs. I was horrified to see obvious dark roots in some of the under-six contestants’ platinum blonde hair that peeked out from beneath their long synthetic ponytails. After about thirty minutes of watching the pageant, I found myself wondering how this one got her hair so smooth and perfectly wavy and marveling at how that one’s blush perfectly complemented her skin tone. When one two-year-old came out on the stage wigless and nearly bald, I thought to myself, “That one needs some hair on her head! How does she even expect to compete?!” And I knew I was getting sucked into the madness.
We all know most girls love feeling pretty and I’m sure many of them love looking at their made-up selves in the mirror, but these pageant contestants are obviously too young and naive to realize that they are being sexualized for a crowd of strangers to ogle and judge. It is so disgusting and so wrong and I wish there were a way to put an end to it.
Want to see some of what I’m talking about for yourself? Take a look at this site.
>Talk about living vicariously through your children! These pageant parents treat their children like personal possessions, not the blessings that they are in reality. And I thought I was abused when Momma would dress me in a frilly dress, then send me out to play, BUT DON’T GET DIRTY! At least I had my own hair and teeth.
>i think they should be illegal. seriously. WHAT THE FUCK PURPOSE DO THEY SERVE?!?!?!!! what do they serve? what do they do?!?! they are fucking stupid and i hate them
>This is so sick. My little girl gets marshmallows in her hair, dirty clothes from climbing around with her brothers, and scratched up knees from running around outside. She has plenty of years when she is a grown up for sitting still and staying clean. These parents are so twisted who use their children like toys to dress up and play with. Let your kids be kids!
>That is totally fucked up beyond belief. My two year old considers her hair in ponytails and a coat of nail polish on her toes “dress-up”. What those poor girls are put through isn’t dress-up, it’s twisted. I’m actually having a hard time coming up with the right words to express just how wrong this is.Obviously the parents aren’t going to stop, so the pagents have to.
>Whoa… not only do they not look like little girls, they don’t even look human! Talk about being objectified, if I were shown that page without any explanation I would have seriously thought that most of the photos were of those expensive porcelain dolls that no one knows what to do with! Yuck!
>It is child abuse, plain and simple.
>OMIGOD.I am so glad I have boys.I could rant. I won’t.I will just say HI!
>That scares me. I used to work for a family whos daughter was in pagents and some of the other parents are monsters.
>Yeah, those pictures just look like dolls. That’s just crazy! Those poor, poor kids.
>That is just. So. Wrong. On. SOOOOOOO. Many. Levels. That is disgusting. It turns my stomach,seriously. The one with the baby in the hoodie. That BABY is wearing LIPGLOSS!!!!!!
>I think it’s great that you wrote that article. I hope you sent a copy to the pageant organizers.How did your pregnancy hormones react?
>OK. I’m sitting here with my two-year-old, and she’s NOT talking to me or even acknowleging my presence. All because I asked her NOT to play with water on the couch.I can’t imagine what TWO-YEAR-OLD would want to go through the torture of what you’ve described. I hate to defend ignoramouses, because I really think there’s nothing redeeming about this pagent junk, yet I wouldn’t want to interfere in someone’s decisions on how to raise their kids and what entertainments they enjoy. I wouldn’t want my kid to have to deal with that, but nor would I want them to suffer under spelling bees or chamber or dance recitials even if they were stellar performers.I imagine some of these kids want to please their mothers and want to enjoy whatever it is THEY enjoy. I mean, really, there is no other explination for me liking the BEE GEES. Great post though. I hope someone reading it sees their kids in it and has second thoughts.
>That website link is seriously freaky. Who did that to their photos? They’ve airbrushed the heck out of them and given them all the eerie glass eye twinkle! I knew one “girl” (she was probably 18 at the time) who was the daughter of a co-worker at my last job who competed in pageants but she was old enough to know what she was doing and she competed in the Miss Teen competition for the state of TN. But this is not normal for small children. No 2-year-old can be expected to pose and model like that. What kind of self image are they going to have as teenagers?!
>Those photos made my stomach turnBTW…I hope you have FABULOUS Friday! Check my blog after midnight EST to see what I’m talking about. 🙂
>I think we crashed the linked site…I totally agree with you. This post brought tears to my eyes. I’ve written about this as well and it sickens me. You are right to call it what it is: child abuse.
>No way those were kids! I thought they were really, really creepy dolls… but then the website said that they were winners in various categories… wow, some of them looked older than I do. : (
>That is HORRIFYING. That website is a nightmare. Good Lord.
>Zombies..the lot of them.If I ever take pictures that look like that, shoot me in the fucking head.
>Ugh, ugh, ugh.
>Some of these children literally look like porcelain dolls. If this was healthy and natural and normal, the photos wouldn’t make me want to cry.
>OMG…never, never, never. How wrong. Those kids don’t even look like kids. They don’t even look like adults. They look like mutated baby dolls that resemble nothing of reality. Sick…The whole thing, and the parents.
>If you hadn’t told me those pictures were girls, I would have thought they were dolls! They don’t look human.
>That is messed up. Those pictures are just scary. I think the most disturbing one is Marisa. She can’t be more than two and she has freaking eyeliner on! That is just nuts. We wonder why pedophiles are attacking little girls. . . that’s why.
>I have showed so many people that Marisa picture. It is so so so scary. And as for pregnancy hormones, the moment the pageant began and the babies began parading across the stage, I felt a wave of nausea that didn’t end until I left. And really, I wasn’t expecting it. I didn’t think it would be all that bad. The Jon Benet pictures don’t look half as bad to me as these pictures and girls do. At least she still looked like a child (albeit a heavily made-up one), with her own hair and teeth and pale skin.Also, I think there needs to be a public outcry against glitz pageants in order for them to be stopped. I know they scaled back after the Jon Benet murder, but obviously the pendulum has since swung back the other way.
>That sickens me.THANK GOD my parents let me grow up a tomboy (as I wanted to). I can’t imagine doing that to a kid. It’s horrible.
>Those pictures are beyond creepy.
>This makes me want to vomit. Or cry. Or scream. It’s awful. Those poor, poor little girls, with their perfect hair, teeth, and smiles, and empty, empty eyes. And after all that money, and all that work, I think just plain old, natural little girls are far more beautiful. Whether or not they’re covered in mashed potatoes. (Can you tell what we had for supper tonight?)
>”Fucking Wrong” sums it up quite nicely … well said!
>You are a strong woman to sit through that event! I would not have lasted 5 minutes – let alone be able to talk civil to any of the competing moms. I truly do not understand that whole scene. You are right – it is a form of child abuse. So sad.
>That’s just sad and wrong. I remember seeing an episode of “Showbiz Dads and Moms” where a mother took her small daughter to get her spray-on tan, after hauling the unwilling child out of bed. Even weirder was seeing the mom eying the competition and badmouthing other families. I’m embarrased to have even seen the show once.
>Why do they look like freaky dolls? I thought it was some kind of joke at first. They’ve even been taught to make a doll face for the photos? None of them look pretty and the fake hair is ugly. So is the clothing. Who is running this thing?My 8 year old daughter is a dancer, and she wears stage make up when performing, and what she wears is no where near the quantity that these little girls have on. And she wears it only because she’s on a stage, in a professional theatre, under real lights. Not standing on a platform in a poorly lit hotel conference room.The babies really frighten me. Aren’t we supposed to avoid putting suncreen on our babies for the first 6 months? But hey, bring on the foundation!These glitz pageants make Miss America look like it’s run by Gloria Steinem. I didn’t even know that things like this existed.
>things like that make me think I am a parenting ROCKSTAR.those poor kids. I hope their parents take plenty of snapshots of them playing — without the pageant glam. I would hate to think that this is going to be how they’re remembered as little girls.
>Another thing that got me about that website was how messed up these kids names were. Hopefully those were “stage names” and not really what their parents call them.I think that everyone has expressed everything I wanted to say about how they look and how their parents treat them.Blech!
>So disturbing.
>ugh… I feel dizzy with nausea. Child abuse, you said it. You gave a poignant description of the mom’s facial expressions and exasperation. The saddest thing is how children KNOW what we’re feeling by our facial expressions and our movements. That poor girl is suffering a wave of unwarranted disapproval from the one person who is supposed to love her unconditionally– love her even with chocolate pudding on her face or peanut butter in her hair. Please do send that to the pageant people. As a matter of fact, can you find a pageant blog to send it to?
>Awful, awful stuff. So few of them look like babies any more, it’s much too much for a toddler.
>OK….I went back to that site because I’m crazy like that. My stomach turned again so it wasn’t last night’s dinner. The parents of those kids need to be sodomized with a cattle prod.
>Wow. I am really sad. Please tell me some of those pictures are Photoshopped. I clicked into that Cassadee’s picture, and I just gasped. I’ve seen moms get that angry at dance recitals too. They’re LITTLE GIRLS, people! Even *I* wouldn’t want to be on stage in front of people.
>OMG, the website’s name is totalknockouts.com??? That is insane.
>Do they not realize this is the sort of fodder that drives pedophiles?? Little girls dressed up like women is a huge turn on for some of those sickos.
>Do they not realize this is the sort of fodder that drives pedophiles?? Little girls dressed up like women is a huge turn on for some of those sickos.
>This is horrible! How could someone do this? Do they really think they are doing their little girls a favor? What must their lives at home be like? And what will their lives be like as they grow into older kids? Or as women? This is wretched, horrible, terrible, behavior. Definitely abuse. Why would anyone turn their baby into a sex object? I’m speechless. I honestly am at a loss. Those poor babies.
>The whole thing is appalling.In regards to that link: are those their real names? Yikes!
>Serious fucked up shit. I have a 23 month old Boy and the LAST thing he does is sit still for 30 seconds. Great way to break a kids spirit. Sickening.
>Pageant moms are the most vile creatures they shouldnt be allowed to raised those kids.
>Getting a 2 year old to sit still to comb their hair is a challenge. There is no WAY that these girls do this by choice. It’s vicarious living, and abusive.If you want to wonder why the number of high-profile kidnaps and murders take place with victims this age, this might be an area of research. The first picture I clicked I assumed was a 7 year old. She was 3. I need a shower.
>Disgusting and sick. I agree. They should all be abolished. Katelyn’s mom is a bitch. How could a parent be so cruel to her child?
>I almost lost my breakfast looking at those pictures…those poor little girls, WHy would their parents do this to them? And that little Marisa-who I imagine had her picture taken with a hoodie because she’s too young to even have HAIR-she is wearing eye makeup! And her eyebrows-done up with a pencil! Horrific!!!!*thanking God my mother let me play in dirt*
>It makes you wish the mothers would have gone out and bought dolls instead of having babies. That’s what they really wanted, after all.Why this type of abuse is legal I’ll never know.
>One word… GROSS!
>Oops, that last comment was mine.
>Vile. Disgusting. Sickening. I’m sure the parents could find a Barbie make-up bust at Wal-Mart for about $20. What purpose does this serve other than to assuage the egos of these depressed and narcissistic parents?
>It makes me sick that the little girl’s mom was so visibly angry and disappointed with her TWO YEAR OLD! And that website was terrifying. They look so distorted, why is that even considered ‘pretty’ anyway?
>A high percentage of those girls will grow up to be anorexics, bulemics, cutters, sluts, drug addicts and/or alcoholics because their first lesson in life was that “Mommy only loves me if I’m perfect.”And they are right.It is sad and sick.
>Reading that made me want to cry. My daughter is barely two, and I wouldn’t DREAM of expecting her to perform a dance routine for ANYONE, much less on a stage in front of strangers. How frightening. Even more frightening for the child, was the obvious disapproval of her mother. THAT is SICK. SICK SICK SICK. That poor child. What a shameful thing, to let your child down like that. By not acting in THEIR best interests, but your inappropriate interests instead. In my opinion that is total FAILURE as a parent. That woman FAILED HER CHILD. How sad.
>Okay, I have a two year old girl. In my opinion she is stunning. Blue blue eyes, black lashes, and a wild head of white blond hair. SOmetimes I even try to put her hair in braids or something pretty, and not just to keep it out of her face because I love to have her look pretty. She usually takes them out about 10 minutes later so that doesn’t last long. I even talked to the talent agent that begged me to let her represent them for commercial auditions. (They are supposed to look real for those and their head shots requirements are to not be snotty or dirty and smiling straight into the camara, no wigs or aribrushing.) I decided not to becasue it’s so time consuming, and I thought they would probably hate it, and they would eventually have to take acting lessons, etc.I think I am pretty normal. Those girls and those parents, ARE NOT NORMAL. There is something sick and wrong about the whole thing.The last compliment my daughter got was while she was crawling around in the grass growling in only an oversized t-shirt, and a see through ballet top that showed her underwear, (Yes I let her dress herself 🙂 her face was smeared with dirt and her hair was a wild matted mess. A woman stopped just to say how beautiful my kids were, and I had to agree.I wish those little girls would hear the same from someone, when they’re being little girls.
>Why can I not write comment length comments instead of entire post size when it come to things like this? WHy?
>”Total Nockouts”? You have GOT to be kidding me. Wrong, just wrong.
>You haven’t even gone to what so many of these pathetic (overweight,tacky,I missed my prom but you will be all that and more kynnalynnebellsavannakaye) mothers look like (we won’t even begin with the twisted misogynistic gay handler guys–what fun, baby drag queens to play with). This.makes.me.fucking.hurl.
>I know I said yesterday that I know two girls who were in pageants who chose it themselves and loved it, but they were also tweens when they got started in it. They were so much more aware of their appearance and their outward image.THESE ARE BABIES! I particularly liked the little baby with the freakin’ mascara. OMG, this is just disgusting. And the names! you know those parents named them those atrocious kassideekenadeebellelynne names with pageants in mind. Ugh. I want to punch someone.
>The sad part is, what happens when they aren’t perfect in a few years. Plastic surgery, bulimia, anorexia, and on and on and on. God help those poor babies, they cant help themselves.
>OMG!!! The 16 yr old had less make-up on then the toddlers. I am so sick about this. The mothers are just sick to try to live through their girls like that and to spend that much money. Donate it people that can really use it for things like hmmm..food, shelter.
>I thought this was a mostly Georgia/Alabama thing (I grew up in Alabama) But I notice that most the girls are from Arkansas. Do they not have anything else to do but pageants?
>Those don’t even look like children, they look like dolls. Totally totally freakish and sick
>Ew, those pictures were horrible. Most of the girls look fake, like blank lifeless dolls. Why would anyone want their child to look like that? It’s not pretty. It’s mostly scary.
>Oh man — this has always made me sick. There have been documentaries on HBO and the like about this very issue, including those guys who “prep” these girls for “pageants”. Those guys should be made to undergo extreme mental health counseling, ASAP.I don’t understand why the mothers prostitute their own daughters!!! Prostitution is what it is, isn’t it? These competitions are disgustingly, inappropriately sexual, and they obviously perpetuate the idea that women are objects. You would think that DCS or whatever entity exists in other states would remove these poor little girls from their homes and require the parents (what do the Dads think about this???)to attend counseling and parenting classes. Of course, I wonder how many of the women would realize that they’re also being used and exploited based on their bodies?Oy vey! Long rant, I’m afraid! Sorry! But Lindsey, thanks for bringing attention to a really crazed aspect of our society. You truly are a Journalist, you know. 🙂
>I have to tell you that I just saw your myspace site and about peed myself laughing. You are so damn awesome. When my girls reach their teen years, I am so doing that!
>So my question is…why aren’t they illegal?It is clearly exploitation of children, I don’t understand why it’s legal. It’s not even for the kids, it’s totally about the selfish, vainglorious parents.Agh. i’m with you. These are wrong, and the pageants should be illegal.So like, when are sane moms going to start protesting the pageants? We could all get together with our messy, unruly toddlers and hold signs and form picket lines and make the news as the nutty moms who have a problem with child exploitation!
>Poor, poor babies…Mary, mom to many
>Glitz pageants are an incestuous business. Have you noticed that it’s the same people who just travel from pageant to pageant, pay money to try to win a trophy that only says they are “better” than the other people in the pageant? They don’t really win anything or represent anything. The audience is just the other pageant parents and families. And the lessons the moms teach by bad-mouthing the competition will last much longer than the lessons about “confidence” and “self-esteem.”There is a woman who does these portraits for a living. She digitally enhances these photos for the pageant people. I saw her on TV once, and she showed the before-and-afters. The kids wear fake teeth and are computer-enhanced to look like those Marie Osmond dolls. The whole pageant business (which is growing, by the way) is just a big group of self-congratulating rednecks who need to find a real purpose on this earth.
>You think this is pathetic – go to a dog show, or a cat show. Holy Christmas Magic! “Best in Show” was a real documentary. Its all so fascinating and yet, repellent.
>i feel sad for the children. sad that they have such sick parents. sad that they are having their childhood robbed from them. they have no say-so in the matter, no one to speak for them, or stick up for them against these parents.
>How is this not child exploitation? It’s absolutely criminal in my mind. Many people think that child neglect is obvious to see– it’s the children who are not bathed, or fed and or cared for properly. I think these children fall into this category.They are not being cared for properly. Their parents are neglecting their need to be and act like children. Many are being traumatized in a way that will affect them for the rest of their lives.It truly is criminal
>Great post, Lindsay. What is this world coming to? I just don’t know sometimes. Child abuse sounds about right.
>I hate that people think this is what shows a child she is beautiful! Those girls don’t even look like real people, they look like dolls. Is that what we want to teach them to strive to be? It disgusts me and makes me sad for the world we live in! I absolutely do not understand how these things are not illegal! No wonder women these days (myself included) have such horrible self esteem. We are told we need to be something nearly impossible in order to be worth anything and to start at such a young age is similar to brainwashing in my opinion. Hmmm, I didn’t even know I had such strong feelings about this. Sorry for all the ranting.
>I was on that site earlier today and all I could think of was the overmedicated/robot women of Stepford.Breaks my heart. If a teen or adult wants to compete, I am all for it… as a child, well, all we are telling them is that being pretty is all that counts.
>I am so behind you on this. You want a show dog, buy a show dog. But let your toddler be a toddler. That those expectations are being put on them and the moms are showing disappointment with them for not meeting them, totally unreasonable and unnatural as they are, makes me angry. That they are being made sexual makes me ill.
>Isn’t it amazing, whenever there is a circus in town, there are all those people who are outraged at the animals being “mistreated.”Where is the outrage at these children being forced to jump through hoops – and that’s EXACTLY what it is – and dress up as a pedophile’s dream?I have a relative, Jane, who has stopped short of putting her child in pageants, but my relative is a photographer and has taught her little girl to “pose” constantly. As well, Jane always relied on her looks to get her though life – and sadly she’s passing those traits onto her daughter. I’m so blessed that my parents stressed education and common sense. Anyway, when I look in the classifieds, I have never seen an ad that requested “pageant experience” or “crown.”These parents are pathetic. Too bad the children can’t escape.
>If you haven’t seen it yet, run don’t walk to see “Little Miss Sunshine”. It will wash off the stink of seeing this garbage in real life. It isn’t one to take the kids to, but the last fifteen minutes I laughed so hard I almost wet myself
>I feel sorry that you had to see this…
>I think they all look like the cheap plastic dolls that you can get at Walmart. Really, are there eyes really that perfectly shaped? It’s really scary, like plastic surgery has already happened.
>YIKES! I’ll bet they will all keep plenty of therapists in business in the future!
>That is one of the saddest things I’ve seen in my whole life. I pity those children.The saddest thing was that you can’t even tell which ones are babies except for the tiny little hands and fingers posed under their faces. Baby hands. So, so very sad.
>So wrong. The photos made me sick. You are right, this IS child abuse….
>As I read this I am looking at my beautiful 11 month old daughter. She has a very natural and enchanting beauty, something I would never dream of stealing away from her. She’s happy being a kid and that makes me happy too. I know she’ll have self-esteem issues someday (what child doesn’t?)and that’s why it’s so important now that I love her for who she is and help her learn to embrace her unique qualities. The mothers (and the silent/standby fathers) of these little girls are robbing them of their innocence. I hope they are loaded because they certainly will be paying for some therapy in the future!
>Good Lord. And here’s a question — on this one, where her bio seems to indicate she’s two….http://www.totalnockouts.com/TKO%20Winner%20Circle/torran.htm…. are her EYEBROWS PLUCKED?I’m going to go sit in a corner in fetal position now.
>I just saw eye make up on what appeared to be a 12 month old?? Honestly, seeing those pictures makes my stomach turn. SO. WRONG. On so many levels.
>The pictures are beyond disturbing. They look like porcelain dolls, china faces painted to perfection.I read the column; fake teeth??!! I’m stunned. C
>They need a life of their own. They need to be normal and want pink vacuum cleaners and stuff. Not have a fake kidlet. Where is that pink dream by the way?
>When did these ‘beauty’ pageants turn into this? For some reason, I’m thinking that when I was a child, it was more about ‘natural’ beauty! These kids all look like Michael Jackson!!! I say it IS child abuse, plain and simple. putting fake eyelashes and plucking the eyebrows of a BABY??? One of the photos on there couldn’t have been more than 18 months old! THAT is INSANITY!!! There’s got to be something we can do to put a stop to this.
>I started snooping around that site, and looked at some of the message boards and I honestly started feeling like I was looking at porn or something. I was really uncomfortable with these little girls made up to look like sexy women. I try to give the families that do this the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they do spend a lot of time with their kids? Maybe they make good friends on the pageant circuit? But I just can’t get over how it really seems some of these babies are being sexualized. Are they? Or are we just looking at them through media induced oversexed eyes? I really don’t see how this could be good.
>Vile…. I don’t think those are plucked eyebrows – more like waxed.
>clearly they’ve been photoshopped like crazy, too. it’s really disturbing.
>I couldn’t even click on the pictures; just the description was enough to make me terribly sad for these little girls.I once read a book called Summer Gloves by Sarah Gilbert about a pageant mom. It’s not the main focus of the book – which is fiction – but it was enough of a glimpse at the world to see how twisted it is.Thanks for calling attention to this abomination. Because that’s what it is, plain and simple.
>It is pornography. That vacant look – I’ve seen that look on women’s faces in adult pornography. I’ve see that look on the faces of prostitutes as I drive by in my warm car with the doors locked and the windows rolled up. Those little girls have shuttered themselves off – gone deep inside their heads in an attempt to survive this. That’s what abused kids do – I know this. That’s what Marisa has done – why her eyes are so blank. Inside her head she’s screaming like a trapped animal. I mean what I said in your previous post – where is Child Protective Services? Shouldn’t the FBI be made aware of this site? Doesn’t it break child porn laws? Shouldn’t these people be in jail?
>’fucking’ right.I felt so sad to read this.It’s so wrong, and I can’t imagine was all that hairspray and fake tan will be doing to their bodies later on in life ( let alone the mental issues ). Hello cancer biopsy 🙁
>Always late to the party, because no one’s posting while I’m having my nightly insomnia-fests.When you described the mother trying to give a “stiff shake” to the poor girl to stop her crying, I could not help but think of similar situations I’d witnessed, when competitors didn’t get exactly the performance they wanted out of their charges, and would, occasionally, take it out on the young innocents…Oh, but I was thinking of HORSE SHOWS. And what else occurs to me is that, AT HORSE SHOWS, this type of exploitative behavior is forbidden, and if you’re caught at it, gets you kicked out and banned. Why am I surprised we set higher standards for the treatment of our animals than for our children in this country?Tonight, I say a little prayer for all the Kaitlyns and Marissas.
>It’s just so wrong on so many levels. Children only get one childhood, and these parents are stealing it!
>I am so sad for those children. I think that the pageant scene is a “Southern” phenomenon. Not many in Maine.So, how do we fix this outrage? Picket events? Write letters to our congressmen? Cultural change can occur when caring citizens rise up together in outrage over a social injustice. Lead the way. I will follow.
>Those photos look nothing like the real little girl. Those photos are created for something called a photo pageant where moms send in those horribly retouched photos and $5 or $10 for each “category” (prettiest, best eyes, best smile, etc.) The winner gets cash, $50 or $100, and a crown. The retouching is a business in itself. I do a lot of Photoshop work so I can figure out how some of it is done, although I’ve never done pageant work. The eyes are enlarged, stretched and apparently the standard of beauty is to have the eyes more wideset which to me looks like they have just stretched the bridge of the nose. The retoucher tans the skin, whitens the teeth, adds more color to the cheeks, adds freaky-looking highlights to the eyes and lashes are painted on. This is known as adding “doll eyes”. I’m not sure how they get the skin so plasticky looking but I’ve used a software called Neat Image which has the unfortunate side effect of making people look really plasticky, so perhaps that is a software effect. If you poke around online, you can find some sites with before and after pageant photo. Apparently, all you have to do is set up your own photo pageant online and if you can get enough publicity, you will have a lot of moms sending you these photos and cash and all you have to do is send someone $50 and a crown every month while you rake in the dough. Seems like a big racket to me.Liz
>Looking at those photos makes me want to vomit. I mean really, turquoise boas and pink fedoras? Don’t these moms have any taste? Those poor girls, subjected to such heinous fashion faux pas so early in life. There is truly no justice.
>Oh, my eyes! This is truly disturbing.
>Sick and sad.And yes, these children are being abused.Jon Benet Ramsey comes to mind.
>Ugh. It’s enough to turn my stomach. Those poor babies.
>oh boy. like someone else said, little miss sunshine scared the crap out of me in the pageant scenes. those girls look so creepy! i don’t get it. i mean, i’m all fine with girls wanting to compete in something if that’s what they want. but why do they have to look like that? why can’t they be judged on their natural beauty? good god, they should be able to embrace the time in their lives when their skin is absolutely perfect and they don’t need to wear a damn thing. *sigh*
>Wow. Those pictures are hard to believe. Although I hope your commenters who say a lot of the “perfection” of the skin, etc. is digital manipulation, the whole thing is just gross.I don’t have kids now, nor do I anticipate having them, but I do have dogs and have competed in performance events (obedience, agility, canine musical freestyle) with them. I’ve seen Katelyn’s mother’s type of behavior from dogs’ handlers (striking the dogs, yanking on the collar, yelling at them) sometimes, and I’ve seen the confusion and fear in their dog’s eyes. I hate it there, and I can’t imagine seeing it in a child’s eyes. Unbelievable that people would do this to their kids. Okay, maybe not unbelievable (I’ve seen horrendous parenting skills at local soccer games, too), but still unfathomable.I guess we should be glad that electronic collars and pinch collars would leave marks on these girls’ skin.I think these girls’ mothers would be better served spending their pageant and prep money on good psychiatric care.
>I agree that the photos are photoshopped, but these girls look no less fake when they’re on stage. In fact, some of them were more made up, much more, than they were in their pictures. It would be AWESOME to picket one of these pageants and call all the news stations about it, because at the one I went to, they obviously tried to keep it on the down low. No signs advertised the pageant outside the conference room and “Private Party” signs were hung on the doors. I wish we all lived in the same town and could do it. If they’re trying to keep these pageants secret, obviously there’s shame in it.
>I recommend the documentary on it that’s on the fourfour blog that is all about this.. it’s sad to watch.
>How very sad. Are the girls supposed to look like wax figures? they don’t look life like AT ALL. How very very very sad.110 comments woman, holy cow!
>Lindsey,look at this interview with a Harvard researcher on child pageantry.The highlight for me was this quote:”I know people who have spent so much on pageants, they lost their trailers.”
>Poor Katelynn. Two is waaaaay too young to be starting kids in pageants, anyway.
>Great article, Amanda. It’s interesting to see that everything they mentioned has gotten worse. The costs are WAY more expensive than they were then and I’d say most of the girls were wearing false teeth by the time they were six, and all of them were wearing wigs. I think the behavior feeds on itself- If one girl with a fake tan and hair and fake teeth keeps winning, everyone will start doing it. I think it’s out of control at this point.Interesting that with all these comments, not one person has even vaguely supported glitz pageants.
>Wow. That description of your daughter playing while the contestants watched her from a distance was unsettling. And the pictures are just freaking creepy. Why do their eyes twinkle like that? Is that a photoshop trick or are they wearing twinkly contact lenses? At first I thought they’d written the name of their town followed by their state under each picture, and then I realized it was the name of the girl followed by the their state. Those are some crazy ass names for towns. And girls.
>Those photos are just plain sick and WRONG. Yuck. Can someone explain to me what the point is in making your innocent little 5-yr-old look like a hooker??????
>That really, really pisses me off. I can’t stand that kind of pony show for little kids.And totalknockout.com?? Seriously. “Hey, your 2-year-old is a TOTAL KNOCKOUT!” WTF?!
>There is only one girl on that webpage that actually looks like a child. Wow. Ridiculous.
>Oh my God. Is this for real??? They look like minature stepford wives or something. I simply can’t fathom how a mother could put her child through something like that. Very, very sad.
>I want to throw up. Talk about plastic people! The eyes are just too eerie. I’m with you. I wish there was a way to put an end to it or at least hang the mothers from their own fake hair while they are parading their daughters around like that.
>it seems like after jon benet mothers worldwide would unite to shut down child pageantry. doncha think?
>it is a bad thing 2 do 2 a kid there is also tha same crap 4 boys 2 thay all look liek a barbie doll it is so sad
>I am so glad this doesn’t go on here in NZ, sick stuff.My little girl has naturally white blonde hair and some bozo asked her sister if it was dyed the other day uh yeah RIGHT.
>My wife linked me to this site and the TKO site earlier. I left a nasty remark about them proliferating pedophelia and told them to stop whoring out their children. Needless to say they deleted the post. God forbid there be a dissenting remark on their little whore house.
>If this doesn’t look like a porn site, I don’t know what does. I expected to see a button exclaiming, “You must be 18 to enter!”
>I’m wondering what the chemicals in all that makeup and other things is doing to those poor children as they are growing up. Will they have a higher cancer rate?What about the psychological ramifications of them thinking their looks are the most important thing.So sad, so sad.
>you people do not have a clue unless you have kids that have done pageants, you will never understand. my daughter does pageants and had started at 11mos old as long as they enjoy it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>Do you even realize how crazy that sounds? As long as they enjoy it? At 11 months old? Sounds like you’re the one who enjoys it.
>i am a pageant mom and I am here to tell you that my child is over 6 years old. We have the glitz pictures. My daughter enjoys pageants. She has made many friends and loves to go to different pageants in different states to see her pageant buddies. We use a Hair and Makeup stylist. We have about 20 different fake hair styles. Clothing, Dresses, we get spray tanned and even have the pretty white teeth to cover up the snaggle and crooked teeth she has. She is an ordinary child that on the weekend loves to get dolled up and have fun. She can play all week, do normal child things, but on the weekend “yes” she has to be girly… If she tells me that she dont want to be in a pageant, then I dont waste my money and time. I let her choose when and where we go. Believe it or not some of these children (i agree, not all of them) enjoy competeing and traveling and winning. Some of the girls have theor college paid for already in cash and scholorships. One pageant might cost 800.00, but if your child is “on” that weekend and wins, then she has $5000.00 plus cash to put up for later. We have fun and enjoy it. My advice to you is “if you dont like it, then dont go. I am sure that you have something better to do then harrass or children. This is a hobby that we enjoy. Let it be. We are not abusing our children…. You are!!!!
>Maybe you should take a moment off the subject and call yourself a thief before you point your finger at pageant parents. Stealing online photos of children that you have no clue who they are is a bit disturbing. Please post your photo so we can pick you apart.Also, it is a known fact that the ones that put down pageants either, do not have children…and if they do then their either ashamed of their childs looks and do not wish to showcase them for that reason. The reason being embarressment. Also..its easier to put down pageant kids than to pay for your child to do pageants. Pageantry is expensive, and putting a child down in a public blog is free. You do the math.Lastly..please remove Cali-Reese’s photo that you have stolen. Thank you.
>After seeing Cali Reeses photo on someones public blog..and that person pointing out all the negativity on the pageantry subject..I have to wonder…. What kind of weirdo goes to a childs beauty pageant, that does not have a child there competing? I mean..is this person a stalker..or maybe a child molester? As a pageant parent, I have to wonder why on earth would you go to a pageant if your not interested in pageants? To simply pick it apart? I have to say this…watching ONE pageant from the side lines does not make you a pageant expert nor does it give you the right to put down pageants because you obviously know nothing about them. The kids that compete in pageants actually LOVE being on the stage. Its true alot of parents put their infants in pageants for the fact that they think they are the most beautiful baby in the known universe and want everyone else to know it too..but by the time they are two years old they are a natural on the stage. They have confidence and love being in front of an audience. So they wear make up, who cares. Dont little girls in a ballet recital wear make up? And what about little cheerleaders? They wear make up too. The truth is, any child, or adult on a stage with lights is going to wear make up. Its funny how people are so quick to pick apart little pageant children and not one thing is said about children in tap or ballet wearing makeup. And you want to talk about overbearing parents? Try looking at little league. Those parents get outright ugly. In fact, I have never seen a pageant parent on the news beating up a pageant child or another parent like weve all seen about sport parents. Soccer moms, little league dads and football dads seem to be psycho. Maybe you should attend more than one pageant and see how things really are. Kids love to dress up. They love the attention. Any negativity is brought on by outsiders, not the pageant family. Outsiders love to point fingers and pick kids apart but are never one to see the real side of things. The confidence pageants build, the friendships that are made, and the one on one parent/child time that the child loves to have. Any child will tell you it isnt about the awards, its about the fun they are having. While the person that started the original post was only a bystander at a pageant and wanted to pick pageantry apart….perhaps that person should get to know the people that compete in pageants next time, and write about that. I would however like to know why she was even at a pageant to begin with.
>Okay, I realize that a lot of new pageant moms are reading this post, way way way way after the pageant debate here has come and gone.Sorry ladies, we are on to bigger and better things.But I do not have Cali Reese’s photo posted anywhere on this blog and why you think I do is beyond me. I have no control over someone else putting a photo on their website. Just because she linked to my website doesn’t mean that I know her or have any control over the pictures she chooses to post. Can you understand that?
>Hi, I am a pageant mom. I am not here to defend pageantry only to state the reason my daughter does them. My daughter is 13 and is in pageants because it is what she wants to do. Yes I am her monther and have the right to say no…but I don’t. My daughter does get tanned, has her hair and make up done and wears a flipper. WHY you ask, because it is part of the sport. Yes I called it a sport, it is to my daughter. She wants to win so we will do what it takes to win. The only thing I do not allow is the overly retouched pictures. I have a very hard time with them myself. My daughters picture is retouched but only to smooth skin and color correct it. We both have made many life long friends in the past few years from pageants. Most are those girls that are in my daughters age division. We are just a happy when one of them wins as well. I do admit that some girls are in pageants because it is the mom that wants them to, but most want to be there. As in every sport you have the crazy parents LOL! And trust me that is all that the media will ever show because it sells. While there are problems with pageants, there are also so many benefits that go along with them.Thanks for taking the time to read my reply. If you have any question post them and I will try and answer the best I can.
>What I find amazing…is that the same people that bash pageants on these things..will yell at their kids who are in soccer, football, and other sports..Its VERY funny..how putting on make-up and having some fun with your daughter becomes child abuse; but no one ever criticizes Soccer (which is a friend of the liberal commie moms) and swimming..I know of children who have been paralyzed in sports ..but our parents are never accused of abuse..In fact..football and soccer are our national treasures..How many times have you encouraged your kids when they didn’t want to do something..didn’t you all potty train? Remember trying to get your kids to “squat” on cue…No one called that abuse..One person wrote..”pageant parents treat their children like personal possessions..” HAHAHAHAHAHA..you probably do the same thing…in a different way..If you have put your child in any AFTER SCHOOL activity or asked them to perform in a school play (on stage) which I’m sure they were afraid to do..Then my friends..you are JUST AS GUILTY..Wake up American moms!! You don’t agree..so you bash what you don’t understand..Typical tolerant behaviour
>Hey darlin – fyi went to show this to a friend and that total knockouts site is down! your doing…?
>Okay, I do agree. I AM a pageant mom, just not the bad kind. My daughter does pageants and she’s 15 months old. She started at the age of 4 months wearing an Easter dress to her first one, which we placed in. We went to State and Nationals, and sure there were “glitzy” girls there, but we weren’t one of them. We just did a pageant this past weekend, and it was a nightmare. I didn’t know the pageant was a “glitz-only” pageant. Sure our dress is a National level dress, but ours looked like a Sunday dress compared to these little girls. The age category was 0-23months and let me just say that my daughter was the only girl NOT wearing a wig and NOT wearing makeup. These tiny girls were wearing more makeup than I had on my face, and I work in makeup! I did curl my daughter’s hair, but that’s because she actually has hair to curl. Why not? My husband looked over at me and said, “Baby, I think she’s gonna be the only one not wearing makeup.” And I said, “Well good, maybe we’ll stand out then.” Well, why their little girls were made to sit still, my daughter was running around with my 4 year old son, eating a sticky bun. Needless to say, we placed dead last. Oh well, I’d rather place last and let everyone see how beautiful my daughter is than to place 1st and never know what the child really looks like. I grew up doing pageants, as well as my sister. I would never put fake hair, tanner, or makeup on my daughter. She’s a child, not a teenager. Those mom’s and those “glitz” pageants give all pageants a bad name. I will stick to the pageant system that we did last year.
>yes you are absolutely right there some sick puppies out there! and children are not robots! my hearts goes out to the ones that are treated like you saw in your pageant experience! but let me, let you in on a little something! not and i mean not all pageant moms are like that! i am a proud glitz pageant mom! and i say glitz because the natural( some not all) are no better, just as bad! they have so many freaking ass rules! if you even were at one time a lil glitz, they will hold it against, you i have been to some that were natural(just like it should be right?) and my baby girl (she is 5 ) the most important thing in my world , was treated like shit because she could walk the X’s like you were suppose to! now please correct me if i am wrong! but i thought if you were good at anything,(ball,dance,gymnastics, etc.)you were suppose to practice! practice makes perfect! you even have to practice to drive ! right? so please dont put words in my mouth i said practice,not slave drive and punish! the point is that i dont like some of the dress up shit that comes with it! but i do like pageants i love them and my daughter loves them! you gave the version of the bad! and maybe that is all you saw, but it not fair to us who are not like that! my girl practices she gets her hair done and her make up amd her lil tan and this should really knock ya fucking shoes off!she has a set of fake teeth! ohh well that is the sport and you dont like dont join in! period! but i am a great mom and if she didnt and i didnt enjoy the wonderful and fun time we have together and the absolutly awesome people we meet! and not to mention how great her freaking self esteem is! then i would quit! but it is a sport like anything else good and the bad! now crazy ass moms that snatch there babys around need to go get in the corner and figure out whats more important! for us who treat are little brats(and let me tell ya these lil queens are brats)like the lil princesses they are will keep on having a grand time! i am not knocking your opinion but tell all sides not just the bad!
>um, do you have your own kids?After reading this site, you seem to have a lot of comments about how to properly live life for someone who married into a family without any experience with children from your own loin
>Um, how much of this site have you read, exactly? Practically the whole thing is about… (wait for it) MY KIDS. 😀
>SICK. There is NO rebuttal or response that can excuse the pictures of those little girls made to look like freakish whore dolls.I have to go vomit. Totally repulsive. And any “mother” that does this or DEFENDS it in any way, doesn’t deserve to be a mother, and is obviously mentally deranged.And for those that think you have to have kids to have an opinion on this, well I do.
>My daughter does pageants. My daughter has been doing glitz pageants since the age of three. We started this hobby when my daughter saw a beauty pageant going on in a mall one afternoon, she started asking "Mommy can I try that too?" So we made an attempt, She adored it, waving and smiling at the judges and demanding that I not be on the stage she wanted to do it "big girl style". Here is the thing, just the fact that my daughter wanted to do this at all is nearly a miracle, as she is a child with high functioning autism/Low function aspergers. Pageants have proven to be extremely helpful for my daughter and I would never put her in a natural pageant. I know your immediate thoughts are makeup, teeth and hair and why???? Glitz is the great equalizer, there is no real way for the judges to judge on anything other than performance , natural pageants are cruel , facial beauty is nearly 100% of the score, as a parent I would rather have the girls judged on presentation and performance ,facial beauty is 10% or less of the score in a glitz pageant and calling a glitz pageant a beauty pageant is a bit of a misnomer. As far as practice is concerned , my daughter who is now 11 and holds 30 crowns spends 1 hour a day practicing her routines, she refuses to wear makeup unless it is on stage or in front of a camera and she is certainly not spoiled. My dd MUST keep straight A's to be allowed to compete, she does not have an IPOD or a nintendo DSI nor do we have a home video game system. She does get a museum vacation in the major city of her choice for Christmas and we take the trip on her birthday.DD also has other hobbies that range from the youth choir at church to Harry Potter. To address the living vicariously through your children accusation…..when my daughter was 7 she asked me to cut off my dredlocks because none of the other pageant moms had dreds, I would rather be at a grateful dead show any day than at a kiddie glitz pageant, there is one problem with this , my daughter HATES the grateful dead , even though she was named after two of their songs and forcing her to do what I want to do would be living up to what you are accusing. As a parent it is not my job to make my daughter a mini me , it is my job to make sure that my dd turns into the person that she was born to grow up to be. My DD has aspirations of becoming a full time youth pastor and attending liberty university, my dream for her was berkeley and wto protests. I had to give up on those ideas pretty quickly lol as i soon found out that I gave birth to my exact opposite.