>Snippets
>-I love Boudreaux’s Butt Cream (it’s diaper ointment, people). I get great pleasure out of writing Butt Cream on my grocery list, then leaving the list in the cart in hopes that the next person will see it and have a little WTF moment thanks to me.
-Speaking of butt cream, the other night while I was changing Baby’s diaper, she pulled a ponytail across her chin like a beard and said in a deep voice (as deep as a toddler can muster, anyway), “Hey. What choo doin’?” I laughed harder than I’ve ever laughed at her before and she did it again for me a few more times, then said, “Mommy, that funny!” The kid just turned two and already, she’s doing comic imitations? I’m in awe.
-When I was a tween, my friend and I would sit in church and count the number of bald men in the congregation. We marvelled at how shiny their heads were, and wondered if there was some sort of shiny head oil that bald men secretly rub into their scalps.
-Don’t you hate it when you see someone’s tag turned up outside the back of their shirt? I have so much trouble keeping myself from reaching over and turning the tag under for them. It drives me crazy. And yet, it’s such a personal thing to do to a complete stranger- I’d be a little miffed if a stranger did it to me.
-What happened to the “B” batteries? Why are there AA and AAA batteries, C batteries and D batteries, but no B batteries? Why not make the AAA batteries “A batteries” and the AA batteries “B batteries?” Wouldn’t that just be simpler for everyone?
-We stopped at a fireworks store while we were on the road yesterday to get gas and go to the bathroom. Baby loved running down the aisles and grabbing random fireworks. Her favorites were cone-shaped ones called “G*olden Showers.” I mean, really.
-Why do parents think it’s okay to take their kids to a practice that’s from 2 to 3:30, then not pick up their daughter until 5 PM?! That’s what happened today. A girl came home with 15 and sat in our house for an hour and a half waiting for her mom. The girls aren’t good friends, so it was awkward. When her mom showed up, she just pulled into the driveway and called her daughter on her cellphone. WTF. This is the second time this has happened in a few months- another girl sat in our house a few months ago for nearly an hour waiting for her mom to pick her up from soccer practice. What is wrong with people? Do they think the coach’s house is some kind of extended care program?
While You Were Sleeping: Two hours of my life I’ll never get back.
>http://www.stupidquestionsanswered.com/answered/battery.htm
>I actually do turn stranger’s collars backwards. But only if they look like they’re nice people.And, the verification word I have to type is “actrus” which makes me think actress, which makes me think of your comic-impression-doing baby.
>Baby rocks.
>I am such a mom. I would see that slip of paper in the cart, and I wouldn’t for a single second think of anything but baby butt cream. …Sigh…
>I’ve always wondered about B batteries also…I have a hard time when strangers tags are hanging out. I want to fix it so bad…That sucks that parents are so sloppy about picking up their kids. Back when my oldest had his sleepover for his 8th birthday, one of the kids was still at my house three days later. His parents didn’t have a phone, so I couldn’t call them. Finally, the mother picked him up, but I couldn’t believe she had left him so long…
>I have had people that i barely know mess with my tag and it totally creeps me out. I hate having people in my personal space unexpectedly. It may be hard to ignore but honestly I wish more people would because I am all about my personal space being personal. You could just tell the person that the tag was hanging out.
>Well of course they do. Didn’t you know that? (Next year, get them to be coach, and you can get even.)Oh, about the batteries: Why should anything make sense? Are you privileged or something?Geez, some women.
>Baby is a riot!!Funny that you mention butt creme… my hub was just changing our son & I was in the next room hearing their conversation. Hubby said “you need some butt creme?” To which the little guy responded, “BUTT CREME!!!” Then the boy proceeded to grab the tube & wipe the creme all over his boy parts — which DIDN’T need it! Gah!
>On butt cream: My son’s dad told me once about the drugstore in his childhood town. The owner’s wife, who had a southern accent, worked the counter, serving sandwiches and desserts. Imagine the snickers when she offered “ass cream” to the kids on those hot summer days… ;^)
>You bring up interesting questions there, Lucinda. I have no good answers for ya though.Oh, and I thought about you the whole time I watched “derailed”. Jennifer Aniston’s charcter is “Lucinda”. That’s actually a pretty good movie. Very surprising twist. I LOVE that in a movie. Don’t let the girls watch it though, kinda sexy for tweens! 🙂
>Butt Cream:The Butt Cream comment reminded me of the time I walked into my mother-in-law’s bathroom and noticed a tin of Bag Balm for cow udders. Huh???? Apparently it is good for a hand cream also. I have to say I stood and stared at that for a minute before leaving the bathroom. I’m sure the look on my face was priceless as I imagined her using it on her “udders!”Tag Reversal: As a mom, I have to mentally check myself when I see something like a tag out of place on another person. I’m so used to “fixing” things on my kids it is second nature. I’m sure wiping off a stranger’s smudgey face with my spit on a napkin wouldn’t go over well!Tardy Parents: I havn’t ever had to deal with that. But, I guess you could say, in your best Southern Belle accent, that parents like that “have always depended (read taken advantage of) the kindness of strangers.”I liked this little hodge podge today. Very fun, Lucinda!
>I always want to tuck the tags back in on strangers who have them sticking out, and I have also wondered before where the ‘B’ went in the battery labelling system. And that movie? Worst. Movie. Ever.
>Boudreaux’s Butt Cream is good stuff. I like products that just get straight to the point in their marketing. I mean what the hell is Desitin supposed to mean? And if Baby keeps that up, she may need her own blog!
>While I was sleeping was exactly what I was doing while I was watching. *Yaaaaawn*
>Ok, between the calling from the cellphone and the SHARPIE on the wall I am seriously wondering about the women in your town!
>Did you confront the woman when she arrived late? You probably didn’t or you would have told us. I know, it takes nerve to do that, but you really should have! Sometimes it’s fun to watch these passive, inconsiderate women get their panties all up in a wad.
>You’re right- I should’ve confronted her, but I was just interested in getting the girls out the door and over to the grocery.Also, when I don’t confront, it’s because I continually find myself dealing with the same parents over and over again (these girls’ lives intersect all the time- they’ve known each other since kindergarten) and I don’t want them to be pissy with me down the road in the event that I need their help with something. It’s simply not worth it.
>LOL!! You’ve made me think this morning… Why don’t they have B batteries??Parents that leave their kids like that should be up for abandonment!! I can’t stand that!LBC
>Golden Showers and Butt Cream. You’re going to get all kinds of great hits with this post. 🙂
>never heard of that butt cream, i only ever used baby vaseline.aren’t all men going to be bald, i thought it was a gene that will eventually make them all bald. i mentioned to someone once that their tag was sticking out, only to be told that it was suppose to, never again.b is for batteries?lol, mine too actually.coach does stand for babysitter, come on mom, get in the program.i like that movie, i watched miss congentially yesterday, sort of the same thing, sort of.
>Very cute little muffin you have there. We have babies at about the same stage 🙂 And that butt cream stuff is fantastic! It puts Desitin to shame! I know how you feel with the kids being picked up late thing, happens at my house all the time. One time I had a neighborhood kid show up at my door around 7pm with his pillow as his Mother drove off down the street? He wasn’t a close friend of any of my 5 kids but he was always around. When I asked what the pillow was for he says “My Mom said I could spend the night, you dont mind do you??” I was shocked speachless .. Things that make you go WTF ??
>Aw, you didn’t like While You Were Sleeping??? That’s ok, I’ll still be friends with you. BUT…will you be still be friends with me if I like it??? :)Baby is too cute, on her way to being as witty as her mom.Oh and it totally bugs me with the tags too, instead of just tucking it in unsolicited, I tell the person their tag is out and if they let me, THEN I tuck it in.
>the girl who stayed at your house because of being late? watch that. the social worker spider senses are going off now. grrr…..
>We’re down with the Boudreaux’s in our home as well. HA!That’s an interesting question about B batteries that I’d never thought of. Hmm…Ok, now I need to know the answer!There was a parent on my son’s baseball team that just irritated me to no end this season. She just had NO CLUE what was going on most of the time. The last game, they showed up 1 hour and 10 minutes late. We’d actually had a delay and so her kid ended up getting to play. All the while,she’s like, “Oh, what? We’re here at the wrong time? Oh, tee, hee!” That poor kid.
>Bearded babies… I see a future in the circus for her! I love the snippets. And just think of the hits you’ll get on the fireworks – even with that sneaky asterix. Nice try, though.
>That’s like a whole list of “stuff” that you’ve just crossed off there! I bet you feel better.I think the B Batteries is in respect of people who stutter or for people who will think its a typo or for the Chinese translation people who are having a hard enough time as it is.Bbatteries.
>That baby is a riot! Make sure you get manager’s fees when she “makes it” as she inevitably will,with that sense of humour. can’t believe the women who left their children there. what is THAT?? i’m shocked!
>This post was frickin hilarious! I love the butt cream too, but had never thought of writing it on my grocery list and then leaving it in the cart. I’m totally doing that next time. ha!
>Baby is awesome! I think she must get your sense of humor. Lucky girl. A healthy sense of humor will get you farther in life than just about anything else.Suggested title for While You Were Sleeping: “Too Bad You Weren’t Sleeping”The only thing funnier than Boudreaux’s butt cream is the Italian translation: “Crema da culo.” HA! Cracks me up every time.
>Uh, more like “While I was SNORING…”
>It would almost be worth it to have a child just to have an excuse to buy butt cream.
>You know, the Beaudreaux’s Butt Cream name caused me to so love it that I bought some once I ran out of my initial A&D stash. Unfortunately it failed to help the butt, so I now dimply let Jack play with the tube and I put the A&D on his nethers. I still get to say butt cream though!